Five Fun Things

I love the adoption story and name. I am about to adopt an “open door” (I like this phrase instead of “empty nest”) kitten. I would love to hear name ideas. He will join me and my 8-year old Pomsky.

Oh my gosh, Carrie! Thank you so much for your reply. These suggestions are so helpful (some of the places you mentioned are actually super close to where we live!). I’m so grateful for all of your advice and support! ❤️

Late to the party Yelena, but just wanted to say, pulling for you and your daughter! I’m so happy to read this update and that she got a favorite meal at just the right moment. We can do hard things, right? (Esp with a lot of love and support and great tips)

I think others have mentioned this – but the Find Me Gluten Free app is very helpful! Obviously take it with a grain of salt and call around if needed, but this should help narrow your search, especially on the fly when out and about!

Thank you so much Sasha! Your words of encouragement mean so much to me! Thanks Sarah! I started using that app after someone else mentioned it too and it’s amazing! That’s how I found the sushi place :)

Thank you so much Carol! such a good tip!

I had the opposite reaction. It didn’t look like MK at all to me.

Good lord. She has always been beautiful. Now she looks thin and beautiful. And how can you tell she is taking care of herself exactly?

@FFS wow, so snarky! I also think she looks amazing. Her well-being radiates from her, imo. I suppose one can never know, she is an actress after all, but she does LOOK like she is “really taking care of herself”. No need to be mean about someone’s opinion, especially when it’s a nice one. If it were a mean comment, then sure, speak up. But to snark someone’s clearly sincere compliment? Go back to bed, lady.

I also was astonished and did a double take to make sure it really was Mindy Kaling. If she’s happy and healthy, than I’m also happy for her!

Yup! They air dry so fast

I hang dry most of my clothes but especially things with elastic, like underwear and socks – they last longer that way!

Lazy girl here- I just sort out my undies and throw them on TOP of the dryer and while everything else is drying inside- gentle warmth and stupid easy. I hear ya though- NOT interested in any additional responsibilities at this point in my life! Hope that helps. <3

I wash mine in a lingerie bag and then air dry. most of my underwear are Gap and seriously 10 years old and still looking good. the dryer ruins the elastic.

Wow, thanks Michelle! I just showed my daughter a photo of these cookies and she got really excited (a rarity since her diagnosis!). Can’t wait to make these together with her!

I’m celiac and if you’re that sensitive just be sure the oats are labelled GF. This ensures the processing and handling of those oats aren’t shared with equipment or trucks that service foods with gluten. xoxo, as Jo would say

The banana muffin recipe on the Bob’s Red Mill GF oat flour package is delightful and so easy! I like to add mini chocolate chips.

I use the web site Let Them Eat Gluten Free Cake. She has flour blend recipes and her bread recipe using her flour blend is fantastic. I make it every week. Give it a try. Hopefully, if lots of people access her website she will be able to afford a better web development team. Her recipes are top notch. Persevere.

Thank you so much Lorange for this tip and the words of encouragement! It means so much!

colanders & strainers too, even if they are metal.

Sarah, oh my gosh yes!! What an incredible group of people here!

*edit* Takis!

Aw, I hadn’t noticed. But as mom of teens with well-worn cabinetry, I love this. And all the love for the streaky oven door in the Paris apartment tour recently. Maybe we need a CoJ post “Show us your well-loved house” with all the nicks and scratches that show a good time. I’m thinking the champagne cork mark on my college house ceiling (25 years ago), the cat scratches to get into the kid rooms, the mulberry stains on the patio, the white paint in shape of my daughter’s fingernails on the desk (when she tried to do her own French manicure with some indelible paint that will never come off), etc. I feel like this is maybe the only corner of the internet that would celebrate (not hide) these “flaws”

OMG the broken cabinet door — same! Is it a 3-boy-mom thing? Sneaker scuffs, dirty doorways where they climb the door frames with their dirty feet, anyone else have a dig pit in their backyard?

Gillian, I think this is a great idea “Show us your well-loved house” or garden, or car, or piece of clothing etc. I want to see things that have “life patina”

Evenings Free, no dig pit, but definitely a bald patch where my baseball players practice pitching and hitting. Sue, swap out eye black stains and a soccer ball-marked garage door for nail polish residue. And Charlotte, “life patina”?! Yes, yes, yes!

Enthusiastic yes to a “life patina” post!

Mariposa Bakery is amazing! My mom loved it and now my Uncle and Cousin (also celiacs) love it.

Wow, thanks Sarah! Definitely bookmarking this place. It looks delicious!!

Same, Charlotte! I’m so touched by this incredible wave of support and encouragement!

I thought the same thing!

this was my take away from the Mindy episode too… really bothered me, especially after her significant body transformation.

My toddler also loves having his toenails painted! I have been using my “clean” brands that I have on hand, but I’m curious which toddler safe brand you found, if you wouldn’t mind sharing?

I actually had a totally different take on the Mindy episode. I’m not particularly a huge fan of hers, though I think she’s an incredible writer. But in a hour+ episode, she talked about weight for probably less than 5 mins total. I think she’s always been open about her struggles with body image, and I think it’s important to talk about. As someone who was raised by a mother with a lifelong eating disorder and suffers from this myself, I appreciate her being real about it.

Melissa, so sorry for the delay, we use piggy paint!! it comes off really easily too.

Oh I am a fellow lover of Iowa Girl Eats, and over the years, I have modified many of her recipes to be vegan – with no issues.

Thanks Carol! I’ll definitely check out that blog!

Oh Ania! I literally have tears streaming down my face as I’m lying in my daughter’s bed while she softly sleeps beside me. Your daughter sounds like an incredible child! She is so sweet to offer her advice (and an invite!). I hope some day my daughter will feel this way too. I’ll try to reinforce to my daughter the messages you’ve shared and I hope that if not today or tomorrow or a week from now, eventually these words will sink in and give her comfort. Thank you so much! Your daughter’s comment is a gift!

Yes to the kindness and thoughtfulness! My daughter isn’t celiac but has shown increased sensitivity to gluten so we are also GF and this year a new friend invited her to a birthday party and the wonderful kind mother made a gluten free birthday cake—for everybody! It was the first time in nine years my daughter has been able to eat the cake (or even the same dessert as everyone else) at a birthday party and it made her feel so seen and loved! I almost cried!

These comments are so beautiful! It also speaks to the larger dynamics of hosting and gathering, which we talk about a lot here. I think there is a myth of “the allergy people are used to it” when there is no GF/nut-free/whatever option or when there is nothing we can eat. But it’s such an expression of love to think about what people need and how we can care for each other with food. I am not a celiac, but gluten makes me feel like garbage so I went GF about 4 years ago. My best friend IS a diagnosed celiac, which is definitely a bigger deal. One thing I’ve learned that I can do is give the celiac spiel on her behalf at restaurants to spare her from having to do it one more time. We order or buy only GF when we are traveling or dining together, and going GF has made me so much more aware of others’ food allergies. I hope we can get to a place where instead of saying “the allergy people are used to it” we can ask “What allergy people are coming to my party and how can I make sure they have equally happy bellies?!”

Every family has its own dynamics. In ours, our dogs have been our children’s, and now our grand child’s greatest joy. Last year, just before our grandson’s first birthday, our son in law gifted my husband a labrador puppy. He wanted their baby to get to be around a puppy, and their own dog is a one dog dog. Now at 10 months, and 20 months, Mo and Luca are inseparable (Luca is at our house many days a week, as I care for him while parents work). Mo is incredibly patient and tolerant, and Luca throws the ball for him for hours in the back yard. I’m so incredibly grateful that they get to grow up together. It’s just pure joy. We’ve never not had at least one dog, usually many, as adults, so it doesn’t ever feel like too much. They are just family.

Thank you so much Hannah! This makes me so hopeful for our trip and for all her future amazing travels in life.

Head’s up for GF pasta lovers: Home Goods has had THE BEST gf pasta straight from Italy. Many shapes including lasagna sheets, shells, spirals, twists, etc. I stock up and am eating pasta (not sure this is a good thing, lol) for the first time in Years. It far surpasses anything I’ve tried yet, except for TJ’s GF Tagliatelle (or papardelle?) but that’s not on the shelves here recently.

many of my friends with gluten sensitivity say they eat everything when traveling in Italy and never have a reaction. it depends on the person of course. Their wheat and flours are different.

As someone who grew up playing Nintendo and PS2 in the early 2000s, I feel like the best advice here in an oversaturated screen time world is to set boundaries. Yes, you can play your video game and have fun with it – but only for x amount of hours and on x amount of days.

Oh I second this! That would be so wonderful. And yes to this incredible community of internet strangers that somehow feel like friends. I have tears running down my cheeks as I type. So grateful for CoJ

Thanks Emma! This is so reassuring and makes me feel so hopeful for our trip!

Thank you Lori! This makes me feel so much more optimistic!

Hi! Celiac here. Re: this piece: “She also said the flour typically used in European countries is different and doesn’t impact people with sensitivities in the same way as in the US.” This is a common misconception, so want to address it here. While some folks with FODMAP sensitivities who are reacting to the fructans in grains may have less sensitivity to other varieties of flour, Celiac disease reacts to the proteins in wheat, rye, and barley. These proteins are present in European flours, so we cannot have flours made from these grains no matter the variety of the grain. (For example: Einkorn or Emmer wheats are just as no-go for us as any other kind of wheat flours). There tends to be a lot of conflation between reactions to gluten protein and fructans, which is understandable because the same grains that have gluten proteins also seem to have the fructans that people are most sensitive to! Since this confusion can be dangerous for people with Celiac, I always try to make the distinction when it comes up.

Just an FYI. As someone with a significant gluten intolerance though not celiac, the European flours are still intolerable to me. I feel like that is a food myth.

Maria, thank you for that scientific explanation of the mechanics! I am also so thankful when the literal mechanics of an issue are clearly explained!

A really great sub is Natori’s Bliss panties. Very similar, all cotton, with or without lace trim. AND on sale right now at Nordstrom.

Hi Emma! Thank you so much for your words of encouragement and advice. It really helps make me feel so much more optimistic and hopeful!

lol love that for you (being the mom of the kid in the pool yelling DONE POOPIN!)

Hahaha – a few days ago I was on a flight home. The “fasten seatbelts” sign was on, and wheels coming down for landing when a 2 year old a few rows ahead yelled out, “Daddy, I have to poop REAL BAD”. His Dad (also wrangling a baby): “NO.” (readers, there was no poo)

I just got a PBS passport account to watch Ken Burns history of jazz docuseries. I’ll add this to my list! Thank you

The Jonathan Groff episode is my favorite too. So joyful!

Thank you so much Alex! I appreciate all these practical tips!

Tuba! Decoupage! I love it. Hope your husband’s ankle heals really well.

Oh my gosh I love this!!

I love Glamorous Wash in Diva by Tyler Candle Co. I mix it with half of my unscented detergent because it is strong.

I hear good things about Dedcool and I like Dirty Labs thanks to Shavonda! Those in Europe, I like Najel jasmine lessive.

The Laundress! Looove their Classic scent and Lady. Don’t be tempted by the Beauty Sleep one. I bought the Beauty Sleep fabric spray and it was pure clueless-dude cologne / Drakkar Noir-adjacent/ mosquito repellent.

Thank you for all of these suggestions!! I can’t want it try them out!

To look fab whilst under the weather is a lovely thought – suggesting that joy can’t be fully suppressed, yes? I hope he had as pleasant a day as possible, and that you can successfully postpone!

I avoid scented laundry because all I can think about is all those extra chemicals going into my liver. Our skin is the largest organ and with every inch awash in mystery chemicals, I just can’t. With cancer so rampant, I feel like I can sacrifice this one major thing. I would love to make an essential oil alternative but am too lazy. Or too busy! I’m too busy. : ). One day…

Thank you so much. Your kind words really lifted me up! Haven’t had covid since 2022 and goodness, it’s such a doozy.

I LOLed at the first part. And may need to try sugaring

The way I loled at the first part!!

To be fair, I live alone with my kids, so if there’s a man in my yard that I didn’t invite there, we have a problem.

Diagnosed three years ago. (I’m 60 plus.) we made our home gluten free save the regular loaf of bread in the freezer for the gluten eaters. Get a toaster and air fryer strictly for gluten free. Follow the_celiac_space on Instagram. I do use her app for my grocery and restaurant recommendations. Learn how to understand and detect gluten. Don’t depend on a scanning app as they aren’t accurate enough for celiac.

Ah, Yelena! That’s so hard. Here’s the thing: it’s likely you are going to want to be perfect at this right out of the gate. I’m not sure that’s possible, so give yourself and your kid lots of grace—you will likely make mistakes, but every mistake is one you don’t have to make again. Things that helped me in the early part of the journey: (1) cravings happen and the world feels pretty empty at first. Buy the overpriced gf convenience food at the store, stash it away, and use it when you need it. Rome wasn’t built in a day. (2) in that same vein, plan meals ahead if you can, and keep your kid fed so you don’t reach the desperate state of “feed me anything, I’m going to cry if I don’t eat.” It’s hard to be successful when your kid is desperate. (3) you need a meal that is a go-to savior when you need a meal outside the house. For me, that’s a safe hamburger with mayo/lettuce/pickles. I have learned that I can generally get a safe hamburger in many places (YMMV depending on lots of factors), and I ALWAYS pack a Schar ciabatta bun when I leave the house. Your restaurant doesn’t have a gf bun? No problem, I’ve got one in my purse. (4) start looking up gf websites online for solid recipes. ATK also has a great gf cookbook. Fold them into your family mealtimes when you have the energy. Otherwise, see (1). (5) depending on where you are located, this may work or may not, but there’s websites and app called findmeglutenfree.com. I use it whenever I travel—even in other countries. It helps me to find safe restaurant choices and sometimes gf bakeries. Read the reviews for a restaurant so you make wise choices for you. All the best. Good luck. You’ve got this, mama.

I had to cut out gluten a few years ago and at first it was really hard and everything felt like a bummer, but slowly you figure it out and it’s honestly not the end of the world. There are so many GF products today and they are getting much better than they were even a few years ago. I made this list (https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZP__qN7f6kTYdzEJ9bAWj3UxxmimOiWRt4usO7q7ww0/edit?usp=drivesdk) my friend whose husband was going gluten free. I live in Michigan, so you may not have these stores/brands, but it might help you get started. Hang in there. It truly will be ok.

This is a niche recommendation but I’ve recommended Jodi Ettenberg’s gluten free translation cards and travel guides to any friends I meet that are celiac and several have told me they were amazing resources while traveling! Jodi has celiac and worked with native speakers and locals to translate specific phrases for gf dining in different countries. (Unrelated: her newsletter is also great but not celiac specific) https://www.legalnomads.com/gluten-free/ Best of luck as you navigate this new road!

Hi Yelena! I’m so sorry your kiddo and you have to deal with this. And I am so happy for them they got diagnosed young so they can become a GF expert in no time, and not suffer for years! I have celiac disease and can tell you that the first weeks, months, and even year or so can be a huge learning curve. But soon navigating living gluten-free will become second nature, and your kiddo will be able to eat safely and hopefully feel good wherever they go! I’d be happy to answer any questions if you like! Drop an email or somewhere you’re comfortable sharing and I can reach out :) Where are you based? Labelling laws (and familiarity with celiac) differ across the world, but I would start with checking out a local/national celiac support group. I found that local celiac/GF Facebook groups can be helpful for community and local GF tips for restaurants, which supermarkets have good selections, etc, but don’t let them overwhelm you. Often there is misinformation and sometimes people post a lot of their fears which can be scary when you’re newly diagnosed and feeling like it’s the end of the world. But rest assured many, many people with celiac (myself included) can eat out, eat at friends’ houses, feel physically well, grocery shop confidently, etc. Have you heard of the app Find me Gluten Free? It can be a great way to locate celiac safe dining in your area. Don’t forget that many foods are naturally gluten-free. Most non-food items do NOT have hidden gluten in them (that was a huge fear of mine – did I have to change hair products, lip balm, etc etc?!?!? I didn’t!). Not all foods need to be certified GF (generally, if the product is or contains a grain, it should be certified GF – except rice, which is not grown near wheat – and especially oats, as they are most definitely contaminated if not certified GF). But otherwise, you just get in the habit of checking labels on packaged foods, and look for things like gluten, wheat, barley, rye, barley malt). You will soon become very familiar with what it safe and what isn’t! One thing to consider will be whether you want to have a shared kitchen or fully GF kitchen – both work and can be done safely! These resources might be helpful: https://www.celiac.ca/cross-contamination/ and https://www.celiac.ca/living-gluten-free/newly-diagnosed/ but look for your local resource too, as they will have important info about local labelling laws that may be different. Good luck!

I’ve been a diagnosed celiac for eight years after giving birth to my first child. My biggest piece of advice is to rip off the bandaid and take your home and kitchen fully gluten free. This can feel huge both from the work it takes to make that change but also as a major adjustment and sacrifice for your entire household. However, I truly believe the sense of safety and care she will feel in her home will make it all worth it. I was diagnosed after a week long stay in the hospital when my son was a month old. I felt broken physically and emotionally from missing him and the terror of the whole experience. Not only did my dad and my husband spend the day cleaning out my own kitchen before I went home, but my parents made their kitchen gluten free too. They wanted me to feel safe eating in their home as well as my own. I still get teary remembering that huge gift they gave to me. So, that’s my advice, if you can and haven’t already. Give your daughter a safe place as she goes through this major adjustment in her life. She’ll remember it forever.

Fellow celiac here diagnosed about 9 years ago! Truly the kindest thing you can do is keep a fully gluten free home until they move out even though it requires a huge sacrifice from the rest of the family. A plus – your life will be easier too – no more cross contamination to stress about! Imagine being a kid and not being able to feel safe and comfortable in your own home and kitchen or worrying about if your mom is accidentally using a contaminated spoon every meal? The rest you will learn as you go and mistakes will be made but I can’t stress enough – give them the gift of a gluten free home.

The beginning in the worst of it. You will navigate your way through and within a year it’ll all feel normal and there won’t be so much “researching.” I’m 11 yrs in with my daughters and the beginning was frustrating. Good news is there is so much more out about it / so many more foods that are safe.

You can do this! My mom had to go GF and once you know what you can eat, the sky’s the limit! It is going to be a change but I promise they will feel better and your family can adjust. My mom learned to bake with GF flours and we replaced all our breadcrumbs at home with GF ones so we could still eat our breaded chicken cutlets or our yummy meatballs. Eating in restaurants can be tricky but Vietnamese was always a safe one for us, as well as Mexican and Venezuelan (Arepas!). For my mom, it also meant she got ALLLLL the GF treats any of us ever saw…. we’d buy them for her every time! She made out like a bandit that way. There are some apps you/your kiddo might want to get, so that you can find GF food while traveling etc. Otherwise, read food labels carefully and get ready to think outside the box.

Oh no, I’m so sorry! My little brother had to do a very restrictive diet when he was little for an allergy, and I remember how hard that was! I have a friend who’s gluten free, so I use the Gluten Free Bob’s Red Mill 1-for-1 Baking Flour whenever I’m baking something for craft nights (since that’s how we met!). It has never steered me wrong so far! People have been shocked to find out the cookies/ blueberry bread/ rainbow surprise cake is gluten free more than once! Also the King Arthur Flour and Bob’s Red Mill gluten free brownie mixes are both really good! I think the King Arthur Baking website would be a good resource for gluten free baking in general. I know this is a HUGE adjustment, but hopefully being able to have some gluten free favorites will help a little with the transition. <3

Oh, also, I’m not sure how old your daughter is, but a sneaky place gluten pops up is in makeup. I had a friend who had to buy gluten free makeup because her husband has Celiac. Just in case your daughter’s at the age where she’s starting to experiment with makeup, or if she might need to switch out some of the products she’s using. (I know mascara was a big one for my friend.)

They say the learning curve for the GF diet is a year, so give yourself grace. If you cry in the grocery store while reading labels, that’s ok! I like the app Find Me Gluten Free for restaurants. It has reviews that distinguish between tastiness and safety and reviewers identify if they have celiac, are symptomatic, etc. I think making your whole house GF is the way to go but not everyone can swing that financially or logistically. The microdoses of exposure do add up. I didn’t feel better until I got rid of all my old Tupperware and wood items in the kitchen and started fresh. Regardless, you will need a separate/new toaster, air fryer and other things as noted above. I watch out for gluten in hair products because I touch my hair a lot and drool on my pillow, etc. For makeup, I just read the ingredients, I don’t limit myself to GF labeled makeup and I’ve been fine. There’s a lot of hysteria and misinformation online, so try to stick to reputable sources or read a book written by an RD.

My husband’s GF and these are a few of our fave options… -The King Arthur GF brownies really are the GOAT. I love a boxed brownie and I can’t get enough of these. -The King Arthur GF pancake mix is also good. They aren’t a dupe for the real thing, but they are delicious. -The Trader Joe’s cinnamon muffins will also leave you wondering if they are truly GF. -We like the Whole Foods corn and rice penne for our pasta. -Try a bunch of one to one flour mixes and see which one works best for you. -We do the I know it’s intimating, but once you get the hang of it we were surprised by how non-limiting it was for our lives. (He still misses a classic doughnut, though!)

I am moved by how many people have jumped in to give advice or share their experience! I had to go gluten free 13 years ago and it was so confusing and honestly kind of embarrassing (it wasn’t widely received yet, and so many people that worked in restaurants didn’t know what it was or if their food had it, I hated asking so my husband would ask for me because I would have just gone without). So to know that so many people have experience with it themselves or for family members and are cheering on you and your kiddo, it’s so lovely! It’s daunting right now, but you’ll get there, and so will your kiddo. This is a hard change 💜

Having grown up in a family full of Celiac and gluten intolerance, I know it’s so hard and overwhelming to get this diagnosis. There’s also a very real grief at the beginning. Your kiddo and your family are allowed to feel that! It’s a big change for all of you. I know that there can be feelings of missing out, stress about contamination, or loss at not being easily able to eat foods you used to love. Be gentle with yourself. It will absolutely get easier in time. Some of my go-to recipe blogs for GF are The Loopy Whisk and Mama Gourmand. If I could give a #1 choice from The Loopy Whisk, it would easily be the GF Cinnamon Buns. Mama Gourmand’s Cup4Cup flour dupe is also really excellent, probably our family’s favourite and the closest to a regular non-GF AP flour we’ve found. So far, we’ve made Mama Gourmand’s hot dog buns and biscuits with it and they’ve both been really impressive. (Co-signed by our non-GF family members). The good thing is that, generally speaking, when you find a good GF flour blend or substitute you love, it is so easy to modify most recipes. Being able to recreate a few favourites and comfort foods can go a long way, especially in the early days when it’s common to feel like you may not get to enjoy food the same way. But finding ways to make it easier for yourself as you navigate this transition is also really important – like having some fast snacks on hand, getting frozen GF pizza or boxed GF mac & cheese, etc. It takes time to research, to find good substitutes and recipes your kiddo + family enjoys. The saying “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time” definitely applies here. Also some fun facts for label reading: despite their names, buckwheat flour and glutinous rice flour (sweet rice flour) are GF.

Forgot to add my bonafides: diagnosed celiac at 27 or so and I’m 44 now. One other thing for when they’re older: you gotta make sure anyone you kiss has brushed their teeth or not eaten gluten. For real. Also prob good to note that some people react to oats even if marked GF. Good luck to you!!

Husband is gf, here’s my top 4 nuggets of wisdom: 1) if you’re an east-coaster, Wegman’s has an INCREDIBLE gf aisle, and—even better—bakery!!! 2) for bread: Franz gf sourdough for sandwiches (if you live out west), Against the Grain for their cheesy dinner rolls (in the freezer section), and this one specific bread brand that is only in UT but is AMAZING called Mrs. Hewitt’s 3) the Pillsbury 1-to-1/cup for cup flour (green bag) is hard to find but WORTH IT. King Arthur 1-to-1 is my second fav and much more accessible. 4) BROWN RICE PASTA! Best GF texture. There’s lots of rice+corn pastas but the straight up brown rice stuff is my personal favorite. Has great al dente texture, and you can usually find brown rice spaghetti anywhere. Other stuff is still good (we’ve come a long way) but this’ll give you the best texture imo. Good luck! I was very strict no-dairy for a while and tbh with dairy most replacements suck. Not the case for gluten free! There are so many amazing subs!!!

If you like to bake, please check out recipes by Aran Goyoaga. She used to blog at Cannelle et Vanille, and has written several Gluten-free cookbooks!

I am just so incredibly moved by all of the responses to my comment! Today is day 2 since getting her diagnosis. Last night she cried herself to sleep and gave herself a bloody nose from crying so hard. All I could do was hold her. But we are 100% committed to being a GF home for her (me, my husband and her little brother) and even my parents who she spends a lot of time with decided to join the GF pact (!!), so we dumped everything not GF and went on a mega shopping spree at Sprouts letting her pick anything and everything that was GF. But of all the things she tried today, everything was “different”, which of course it is! For those who asked, she’s 11 and doesn’t wear makeup except lip gloss. I’ll have to look into safe brands. We’re in Southern California so lots of places with GF options, but is it safe? How can I be sure there’s no cross contamination? I read somewhere that I need all new pans, cutting boards, etc because the one’s we’ve been using will retain the gluten that’s been on them. Is that true?? So many endless worries at every decision point throughout the day. It’s evening on the first full day, and we are all exhausted! And I was thinking about the trip to Italy we were planning to take next year (her first time to Europe!) and that she wouldn’t be able to experience the pizza, or the pasta or the… And the emotional piece of it all…I feel like I’m saying all the wrong things all the time. I really just want to cry, but I know I can’t

I just saw your comment on Italy. My best friend has Celiac and while it is true travel can be trickier do not lose hope! She literally just came back from Rome and found delicious options! (I was sent photos from Gluten Free San Pietro that were amazing and this place had a pizza oven just for gluten free https://cimarra4.it/) My point isn’t to recommend specific options but to say, there is hope, foodie travel can still be done! I have traveled with her in several countries and clearly we pick options where she can eat, it can be tricky but I swear there are more options out there than it feels like in this moment!

Yelena – A celiac friend of mine went to Italy last year BECAUSE it has so many great GF options (?!?!). Apparently celiac is pretty prominent in Italians, so there are tons of options and destinations for GF-specific food. Your trip won’t be ruined!!

Yelena, if it helps, Italy is phenomenally good for gluten free – by law in Europe (but not the UK :-() all of the major allergens have to be listed on menus, only very tiny restaurants are exempt, and they have amazing gluten free options. You’ve got this, Mama.

Helena, regarding travel, I am a celiac currently in Madrid and we don’t even have time to eat at all the dedicated gf restaurants and pastry shops. I have a bag full of gf croissants and chocolate neopolitanos. Your daughter will eat SO WELL in Italy, so cross that off your list for now! If you can figure out ways to make her comfort foods: important dinners and ultimately Thanksgiving stuffing and Christmas cookies, those are the things she is mourning the most. In about two months, splurge on some Mrs. Katz Twinkies, Ding Dongs and Doughnuts. By then they won’t taste as different. If you want to get in touch at akpscholer (at) gmail, I’d be so happy to arrange to chat in a few days, when we’re back from Spain.

Yelena – lots of great advice so far. i know its SO HARD – but i promise you it gets so much easier as time goes on. My daughter was diagnosed at 5, and is now 13. For the tweens and teens – they hate to feel “different” – but i will say that my daughters friends and their parents have all been amazing about it – always ensuring there are safe options at parties and get togethers. When my daughter feels bummed I point out all the people we know with food allergies, and that “everyone has something” they are dealing with. We have travelled all over, even internationally, and with the right preparation, we have had no issues. some things are a bummer – not being able to have french fries when everyone else is (if there is no dedicated fryer). You mentioned Italy in your follow up comment – apparently Italy is amazing for gluten free! we are going later this year and my daughter can’t wait. Oh – and people might think your whole family will be healthier going GF, but i’m here to say…. you can find ALL the snack foods and cookies as a GF version and dare i say, the GF Oreos are even better lol!!!

Iowa Girl Eats has the most delicious gluten free recipes. She has 3 kiddos so most of her meals are very kid/family friendly. It’s ok to be overwhelmed – it’s a BFD. There are so many resources out there and your kiddo will so much happier.

That’s not to say it doesn’t suck though – totally fair to grieve this. Asking a million questions at restaurants is really annoying sometimes! Having to tell a friend their beautiful meal they cooked is actually inedible to you can be awkward! But all navigable and after a mourning period, have some fun exploring cool products / local bakeries / etc to get excited about what’s available and delicious. Sending a LOT of love ❤️

[woops only part of my message posted below….reposting the full TALE!] Oh this runs in my family. My brother got diagnosed about 30 years ago and there were NO products. We had to mail order all his food and he constantly got contaminated at restaurants b/c no one really understood or took it seriously. It was very tough but it also turned his health and his life around. SO many unexplained issues and troubles [mental, physical, all of it] that got magically cured once his body was able to heal. Years later my mom got diagnosed at menopause and then I also did after I had my second kid [it can be totally dormant and get kickstarted by hormonal changes, I learned]. I have a niece with it and I get my kids tested ~every two years for now. They are asymptomatic but carry one of the genetic markers so it COULD develop. All this to say, there is a great community out there for your daughter, she will absolutely adapt and awareness is amazing now, which is incredibly helpful. I have seen my niece [who is now 14] navigate this beautifully, advocate for herself, and make it work in so many scenarios since she was a little kid. That’s not to say it doesn’t suck though – totally fair to grieve this. Asking a million questions at restaurants is really annoying sometimes! Having to tell a friend their beautiful meal they cooked is actually inedible to you can be awkward! But all navigable and after a mourning period, have some fun exploring cool products / local bakeries / etc to get excited about what’s available and delicious. Sending a LOT of love ❤️

Yelena, you’ve gotten so many comments already so I won’t add too much except to say: go to Italy! My daughter and I have celiac disease and Rome was the best eating we have ever done by a longshot. I ate GF pizza at 4 different places and every one was miles better than anywhere in the U.S. We went to one restaurant that literally had two kitchens making the same menu, one GF and one not. Multiple all-GF gelaterias within walking distance of our Airbnb — we could eat GF cookies n cream gelato on a GF waffle cone WITH A GF WAFER STUCK ON TOP! An all GF grocery where we filled a suitcase with delicious pastas of all shapes. God, I can’t wait to go back someday. (Our experience in the northeastern corner of Italy, where my husband’s family is from, was totally doable but not magical like Rome, eating-wise.) And, as everyone has said, it’s a steep learning curve but it gets very manageable once you’ve got the hang of it.

Popping back in to say YAY GF home and grandparents! so so so wonderful. Here are my functional tips after starting hyper-cautious and then pulling back as I figured out what was in my range of risk tolerance: 1. Things that probably need to be replaced in kitchen include: toaster, cutting boards with heavy knife marks (because that will hold gluten), measuring cups or spoons that have joins that cannot be fully cleaned out (vs. ones that are all one solid piece of metal), electric mixers (these have fans that can suck up and hold flour so I really recommend replacing if at all possible), food processor, air fryer, blender is probably ok unless you are in the habit of preparing gluten containing foods in it. Slow cooker and Instant pot probably ok with a very good scrub (instant pot may be harder to get clean) Give your pans and pots a good scrub and they should be fine unless they have joins where gluten could hide. Same with dishes. 2. My family travels a lot to cabins, vacation homes, friends homes etc. It took me a while to figure out how to prepare food in a kitchen with utensils that may or may not have been used by prior visitors with gluten. I keep a “travel bin” of cooking supplies (cutting board, knife, measuring cups, tin foil, spatula and a few other things) that I bring with me if we are driving to these places along with a dutch oven. Then, when I arrive I pull out the existing utensils, silverware etc. clean the ones I feel confident can be fully cleaned (no nooks/crannies/etc. for sneaky gluten). I put the rest of the utensils that I don’t feel confident I can get clean enough into a single drawer. then I wipe down the other drawers, replace the cleaned utensils and enjoy my stay. Make sure you wipe down the silverware organizer if there is one. 3. Going to peoples homes can be a minefield. They are going to want to prepare food for your daughter and all of them will have the best of intentions. However, many will not have the understanding of cross-contamination to be able to do it safely. I always bring one dish that I love to eat that everyone can share in as well as desert for everyone. That way I have a full meal, I can politely decline food I’m not comfortable with without having an empty plate, and I’m a good guest :) 4. Your daughter (and you, and your family) will make mistakes and get glutened, especially in the first year. This is ok! It’s not the end of the world! It will be hard, and uncomfortable, and she will get sick and that sucks. But she will also heal, get better, and become more confident moving through the world and holding space for herself.

I got diagnosed 3 years ago. You’ve already got great suggestions here on the food portions, so here’s my mental health recommendation: make things less about food. Plan trips around activities and pick up safe foods from the grocery store. Have family days at the park or over board games instead of around the dinner table. Have a ceramics painting birthday party instead of a pizza party. Yes, you can find wonderful safe foods to enjoy! But also, celiac makes food so much more complicated, so it can be really nice to have a shared activity that doesn’t require intensive planning or safety risks.

Oh! And hopping back in to second Alex’s comment about the app Find Me GF. There are so many of us celiacs in this thread I want to say this is not only a great help for finding restaurants but ALSO as great service we can provide to other celiacs. If you can, leave reviews! We all have those neighborhood restaurants that we know are safe because we know the owners or the chef (who so often have created these safe practices because of a loved one with celiac). Write reviews and share them! The more that we can spread the word about the safe places and note those that haven’t gotten their protocols figured out the easier we can make it for other celiacs who are passing through or less familiar with the area. Ok, hopping off my soap box and actually getting back to work. Best of luck to you and your daughter, Yelena. You sound like an amazing mom. She is lucky to have you.

Yelena, I love seeing how much support you have here! One more note of caution: envelopes! I know someone who got very ill after licking all the envelopes for his graduation announcements. I don’t think ALL envelopes have gluten in the adhesive, but they certainly don’t tend to label it! Buy a moistener thing from the office supply store.

Hi Yelena, This can be a tough transition to navigate, especially for an 11 year-old. Grieving seems totally appropriate to me. People have given great advice here. Just going to add a few things: 1) Trader Joe’s used to be terrible about GF foods but is now pretty good. They have the best GF pasta I’ve found: the egg noodle fettuccine, Try Googling the words “boursin pasta with lemon and pancetta” and make that with the egg noodle fettuccine– divine! TJs also has great GF cinnamon muffins, a decent little yellow sheet cake, great chocolate chunk cookies, and a good baguette. The bagels and donut holes are passable. 2) If you are ever in Portland, Oregon, I highly recommend Kyra’s Bake Shop. She won Cupcake Wars *four times* going up against bakers who were using regular glutenous products. I’ve only had her stuff once at a friend’s birthday. It was maybe 8 or 10 years ago and I remember it so clearly. I was fully prepared to politely decline the cake that everyone else was having when she surprised me by having had her parents pick up a gluten-free cake to include me in the celebration. Pretty sure I cried. Then she sent me home with the leftovers and I cried again. People will be good to you all as they have been to me, and as they have been in this comments section. Sending love!