Have a Great (Long) Weekend.
What are you up to this weekend? We watch lots of ’90s movies in the summer (Clueless, The Fugitive, The Firm) and next up is Quiz Show. Have you seen it? I remember loving it. Hope you have a good long weekend — maybe with fireworks? — and here are a few links from around the web…
Five friends try on 25 swimsuits — and tell us what they loved and hated. (Big Salad)
I don’t generally love hot dogs, but I would love these hot dogs.
Who wants to visit a little red cottage in the Swedish countryside?
I keep spotting ballet sneakers on women walking by our house. Here’s a cute leopard pair and a mesh version. (Get 25% off regular-priced styles with code SPARKLERS, from July 3rd to 5th.)
Turning 100 years old. So moving.
What happens when kids design playgrounds? Lava, mushrooms, giant chess. (NYTimes gift link)
If you need me, I’ll be over here reading about heatwave tricks in a wet cotton T-shirt, in front of a fan.
Have you ever gone to a restaurant and spotted a celebrity at another table and whispered about it forever and then realized it wasn’t the celebrity? We’ve done that recently with Stanley Tucci, Scott Speedman, and Randall Park. Point is, we’re cool, you guys!
Banana Republic is also having a huge sale, now through July 8th. I’m eyeing this easy dress, perfect tee, and summer sweater.
Misophonia fireworks. (New Yorker)
And this summer, Freddie has been grilling on the weekends. For those of us who eat meat pretty sparingly, I appreciate that ButcherBox delivers the highest quality humanely raised meat and wild-caught seafood to our door. Get $20 off your first three boxes with code COJ. Thank you, ButcherBox!
Plus, four reader comments:
Says Anon on five pick-me-ups: “When I got divorced, I went into our local mattress shop in Seattle to try some options. When I explained things to the sales guy, he said, ‘Oh! You want the divorce special!’ He brought me to a very comfortable, mid-priced mattress and encouraged me to try a whole bunch of others before deciding. In the end, he was exactly right — I wanted the divorce special.”
Says Rose on five pick-me-ups: “This summer, we purchased a bubble machine for our two-year-old. It is MAGIC. Beautiful magic! Grown-ups, treat yourselves to a bubble machine.”
Says Sar on what conversation-starting questions do you ask on dates: “I love food-related questions. Answering a sincere question of ‘What did you eat today?’ from one of the foodies in my life has long comforted me. It’s both intimidate and mundane — perfect for a date.”
Says Betsy on 9 genius secondhand shopping tips: “My #1 eBay shopping tip came from a Hovey sister on CoJ ages ago: use Boolean search terms! I rarely wear black so almost all of my eBay searches include ‘-black,’ and then whatever’s important to me is in quotation marks, like ‘100% cashmere’ or ‘vintage.’ Absolute game changer.”
(Photo by Giulia Squillace/Unsplash.)
Comments
158 commentsI also adore a food question on a date. On our first date many years ago, a guy and I chatted about what we had had for breakfast that morning. He had made an omelette with fresh veggies. I had scarfed a handful of Sweet Tarts on the metro to work. Fast forward to our second or third date and he was dropping me off after a great night. He coyly said “I want to make you breakfast in the morning” and I promptly got all awkward, thinking he was asking to sleep over when I wasn’t quite ready. Instead, he pulled out a box of Sweet Tarts from his center console. Dear reader, I married him.
I’m laughing that two people have quoted my “we do not yuck someone else’s yum” lesson. I feel like I’m having a micro mini Larry moment (who I fondly think of every single time I put away my cart)
Clicked on those ballet sneakers and immediately thought “Aww, my girls wore those every day when they were in kindergarten!” Not here to yuck someone else’s yum, but the “girlish” trend in fashion (big bows, Peter Pan collars, etc) is not for me.
Randomly Jacob elordi lives behind our kids school and lives a mostly anonymous life amongst us all. Cue new kardashian girlfriend visit last week, and quicker than you can say “paparazzi” it’s celeb spotting central!
Hot weather tip from the years I lived in a historic home in Utah without A/C- freeze water bottles and then put a bunch in your bed at night! It’s a dry heat there- so the moisture wasn’t bad but I think if you had a fan going in the humidity it would still work!
I would swear up and down that 25 years ago I saw the Empire Carpet guy waiting for the bus at Lincoln and Fullerton. Chicago people know.
588-2300, EMPIIIIIIIRE!
Several years ago I swore that I saw Larry David standing in the parking lot of the Bozeman, MT airport. Later that night, after returning home from our vacation, I happened to read that he was indeed in Montana for a wedding that weekend—so, it really was him!
Sat behind james franco, before he was terribly problematic, in a timeless new orleans restaurant. His back was towards me and my asparagus in hollandaise sauce, but the mirrored walls helped confirm any “could that possibly be” suspicions.
That Onion article…15 years ago I was that girlfriend learning the family’s “weird card games” and now my husband is teaching them to our kids!
I might have actually seen Stanley Tucci at a grocery store in Rome. He was impeccably dressed and had on sunglasses and a hat so I couldn’t tell for sure. Plus, he was shorter than I expected so I assumed it wasn’t him. Turns out he’s 5’8″ so maybe it was him after all.
I was sure I saw Stanley Tucci on a train in Portugal last year…My spouse kept telling me to “stop staring” while I spent majority of the train ride trying to remember the actor’s name.
Stanley in Italy!!!! Be still my heart. I’m choosing to believe it was him!
I saw Stanley Tucci at JFK once, and then again less than a year later at the Met. Afterwords, I kind of hoped seeing him around NY would be a delightful reoccurrence, but alas, so far it’s only been those two occasions.
I definitely saw The Tooch on a train in France in 2004. Feeling connected to the CoJ community, yet again, with all of these shared sightings of our culinary short king!
I saw Jeff Goldblum at Whole Foods and of course it was actually Jeff Goldblum because no one could possibly radiate that much Jeff Goldblum except actual Jeff Goldblum!
Ballet sneakers – ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I only just got used to looking at my enormous feet in chunky sneakers and now we’re going back to tiny shoes again. This might be my declining estrogen talking, but I think I’m ready to just pay a little less attention to the trends and work at looking fresh and cool in some timeless classics that suit my body. Call it my fashion ah ha moment!
My feet took one look at those very cute, very thin, shoes and, nah, girl, we better than that! Give me all the cushion, please, thank you.
💯💯trends be damned! If there isn’t enough arch support for my aging flat feet, it’s a no!! Going to physical therapy for a partially torn calf muscle led to the discovery that I have flat feet, my hips are weak and my left knee dips inward. Perimenopause is a wild ride and it’s a huge reminder that strength training with rubber bands is wonderfully effective and gentle on our bodies and that crocs and shoes with no/little arch support will catch up with you if you’re lucky to age.
I started to type a celebrity citing story and then thought of AI taking all our stories and …well you’ve been spared my story. lol “Be Safe, Have Fun, Don’t Die” is a great watch!
I loved that movie also! The opening scenes in the diner are surprisingly hilarious
I wish all Americans grew some of their own food and had intimacy with the land that provides for us. I’m “fed up” with the humanely raised meat ignorance. As a teenager I sat in an un-air conditioned tractor in 95 degree summer heat putting up premium alfalfa hay to feed a small herd of Angus beef cattle. Calves came into a warming shed into the winter if they needed it. Without the human care their ears got frostbitten and were permanently stubby. I’m proud my place in the economy of living things, and proud I got to help raise top quality American meat. Come out west and see for yourself someday.
I always look forward to these posts! What I wish, is that if you are posting links on here, from Big Salad, you would make those articles free for everyone. I really wanted to read it, but I cannot Thank you!!!
As an Aussie with my fair share of experience with hot weather a few tips that might help someone. – Seek shade, if you have to be outdoors umbrellas or hats are great. Bonus points if your umbrella is a light colour on the top and dark on the inside. – Keep curtains/blinds closed during the day, especially if you get direct sun on your window. If you can, shade the outside of your window to stop the sun hitting the glass (tarps/sheets/foil all work wonders). – But catch any breeze/cooler air at night. Open all the windows/doors, if you have exhaust fans that can pull hot air out, use them! – Damp towels, spray bottles are super helpful. I often lightly mist my body/bed before going to sleep as it feels just that little bit cooler. – If you have a camp bed, use it. The extra airflow underneath helps move your body heat away. – Fans are amazing and very energy efficient – It is okay to hate the heat – Don’t try to carry on as usual, heat is more dangerous that many people realise. – Stay hydrated – Look out for each other Here are two other great reddit threads https://www.reddit.com/r/AusRenters/comments/1q79dgg/heatwave_survival_guide/ https://www.reddit.com/r/heat_prep/comments/1uf5atn/cheapfree_australian_heatwave_survival_tips_from/
“It is okay to hate the heat”. As a Phoenix native, I agree wholeheartedly haha. It is nice to be reminded of this so thanks :)
Quick showers every few hours help a lot
Never saw a (fake) celebrity, but I had a friend who pretended to be one at a restaurant in Italy – he asked to be seated where the paparazzi couldn’t find him and he got the VIP treatment!
My husband is a doppelgänger for Jimmy Fallon! When he lived in New York, people would follow him around the city stage whispering about spotting Jimmy Fallon. I found it hilarious and sweet until one day they staged whispered that I was very definitely NOT his wife Nancy. We had to turn around and dash their dreams.
We are having a 4th of July potluck and cookout with friends and family. I bought a betsy ross flag to hang off the deck and when night falls, we will have a perfect view of the city’s firework show. 🇺🇸
Years ago, when I was pregnant with our second child, my husband and I took a four day trip to Santa Fe from NY while my parents babysat our first born. I was totally convinced that Bruce Springsteen was across the room and ignored my husband for the entire meal. It wasn’t Bruce. Not only was it not my finest moment,I felt terrible for being such a bad date on what was supposed to be a romantic trip. What can I say? Things happen… We had two more children so it couldn’t have been that bad!
No nod to July 4th? I hope NYC stays cool in their 78 degree apartments!
The regulation for government buildings, federal and state buildings where people are employed, etc.has always been 76 degrees. 78 is no big difference. People will grab at any little thing to diss a progressive. I’m.not sure of the meaning of your words, so don’t want to speak specifically about what you are or not implying. But I’ve read similar statements from the right that have come on the news. Are people not aware of the decades old regs ? Or just complaining about 2 degrees because it’s Mamdani ?
Gosh, Rachel, thanks for all your sincere concern! Yes, every single person ignored the 4th and instead took refuge in our slightly warm apartments to avoid full black outs via our aging utility grid. We shunned the tall ship regatta up the Hudson and the multi-location Macy’s fireworks displays because that’s how we roll. We love NYC and hate America and democracy.
Why do you need a “nod to July 4th” lol. Not all of the readers here care or live in the US. Plenty of other 7/4 mentions in US native.
Was it the 4th? Oh. So that’s why on the 5th people set off illegal fireworks for two solid hours at bedtime, on a work night, *democracy* (I was hiding in the mountains on the 4th, for no reason at all) I hope Jo says something next year so I can prepare.
My friends and I had brunch with a perfect view of Rob Lowe and his family having brunch. The wait staff printed out a picture of him from The Outsiders and brought it over to him and he laughed so hard and then turned to our table, pointed to the photo, and gave a pretend sad-face. It was the best!!
I hate shoe shopping so I tend toward classic looks that will last a long time, but the ballet sneakers are oddly compelling. What’s the ideal sock situation for these?
At puppy training class last month I learned that there are puppy bubble machines that have bacon flavoured bubbles!
please please I’m begging you – don’t set off fireworks if you’re inclined to do so. they scare not only house pets but they terrorize wildlife. the way you might enjoy a loud bang at the sight of a few colorful sprays is not how animals experience these noises. birds, raccoons, coyotes, dogs and cats are oblivious to the national holiday and suffer the terror of an unexpected sensory assault. please skip the fireworks this year. please.
Consider also sleeping babies, people who work/sleep different schedules than you do, and people suffering from PTSD, especially those who were in the military.
Feeling like absolute trash this Monday morning after last night’s 2 hours of fireworks. I am sick, have to work, haven’t slept well since sometime last week. I can’t even describe how much I loathe this holiday. (We were gone for several nights, camping, but had to come home for work). Our puppy probably got sensitized last night. We gave trazodone but it’s far from a miracle. He hadn’t reacted at all to loud noises, until now. All so people who complain about the price of everything can spend thousands on fireworks to set off on JULY 5TH ffs.
On the “celebrity” sighting: My BFF and I were at a mid-priced fish restaurant in Santa Monica and became convinced the man in the booth across from us was Lionel Ritchie. I saw celebrities constantly, at all sorts of places, when I lived in Los Angeles, so it was reasonable it could’ve been him. We debated for what must’ve been 30 mins about whether it was, trying to determine whether Lionel would even eat in such a place, would Lionel likely be accompanied by the person he was with, etc. All of this had to be done surreptitiously of course because we didn’t want him to notice us staring at him repeatedly. It was hilarious. We finally determined it wasn’t him (or was it?) and left. Fun memory of my LA life (which I still miss terribly!)
What is with ugliness as fashion recently? Ballet sneakers, brown with black, no nice patterns. It can’t be an anti-capitalist or truly feminist statement with the prices of clothing these days. Would love to see a substack think piece on that.
As a lifelong equestrian, I LOVE black and brown together when it’s done correctly. But the jury is still out on ballet sneakers as far as I’m concerned.
I just got those mesh sneakers by Kenneth Cole – but in a fun bright blue! I haven’t worn them yet – I got them for a trip to the UK in a couple of days. I hoped that if it is still hot in London, they will feel cooling. I have two bona fide funny celebrity sightings: 1. I was walking down the street in River North (Chicago) and this woman was walking toward me and I thought, “wow, that weird woman looks like Helena Bonham Carter.” Kept walking toward her and moments later, I said to myself, “wow, that weird woman IS Helena Bonham Carter!” 2. I was in a Whole Foods in the Gold Coast (also Chicago), and I saw a man who looked like John Malkovich. I followed him around and discovered it was indeed him. I call this “the time I accidentally stalked John Malkovich.” Weirdly, I had more celebrity sightings living in Chicago than I did living in NYC.
I have to believe that 100 sign is for a birthday, the upper east side is full of NORCs (naturally occurring retirement communities). My old neighbor on 79th Street was a well known doctor who saw patients until she was 105! https://www.nytimes.com/2021/12/18/us/shirley-zussman-dead.html?unlocked_article_code=1.u1A.1gDM.Wg3wCnfSoUhB&smid=nytcore-ios-share
Apologies if it’s a sponsored link but I am MEGA disappointed with the quality of the Banana Republic items I bought recently on a trip to the US. Two out of the three things I bought, I’d return if I could but I can’t. I used to think BR was reliable quality but based on this, not so much. At least I’ve had the opportunity to dust off my sewing skills?!
Hi ! Sorry, no words on climate change ?
it’s hot outside? This is a lifestyle blog, not a political site. They can’t possibly please all the people all the time and I personally don’t care for too much politics on a site that I come to for escape from the dumpster fire that is our current situation.
The weather speaks for itself. Temperatures are hotter than usual all over US and Europe. Summer storms that cause damage are way more prevalent. Does Jo need to specifically call this out? I think we all know by now.
We had a heat wave while I was 9 months pregnant and one night I felt like I was a furnace! I soaked a towel in ice cold water and put the huge box fan at the end of the bed and used the towel like a blanket! The kids dad told me the next day that he was afraid to fall asleep because my skin was so cold to the touch he thought I was going to get hypothermia poor guy!! I just remember finally feeling cool enough to sleep. Right now that kid is sleeping against my back still being a human heater!
When we went camping in the CA or AZ desert as kids my dad would dampen our oversized sleep shirts and put the fan on us in our camper beds and he called them “wet sockaroonies”. Worked like a charm to keep cool/still do it.
Ha! I met my husband because of the “Divorce Special” except it was for new sheets, not a mattress. He was walking around the bedding department looking very lost so I offered to help him (I didn’t work at the store, just shopping, too.) He explained he wanted new bedding because he was going through a divorce so I helped him pick a complete set. After we were done shopping, he offered to buy me lunch to say thank you and I accepted. Little did I know, I’d be sleeping on those sheets a few months later. 😉
Hehe yeah girl
love this so much!
I just finished reading the Keith McNally memoir I Regret Almost Everything. I loved every bit of it. Amazing getting inside someone’s head and all the people he has come across over his life, decisions he has made, mistakes (!) and finding purpose now I’m keen to get to New York asap but I’ll settle for pretending in Melbourne Australia.
wet a washcloth with cool water and place on back of neck or head- when it gets warm from heat transfer, swing it around in the air for a second or two and it will cool off- this trick also works great if you are a little nauseous in the recovery room – don’t ask me how I know…..
I’ve been living in those Puma ballet flats but in black – so comfortable to walk miles in. I really need to get more. Also I don’t eat hot dogs, but that iceberg / crushed potato chip situation on a sandwich or just out of the bowl I am 1000% here for.
I was POSITIVE my husband was sitting next to Nikki Glazer on a flight once. Unless Nikki Glazer speaks with an Italian accent, I was wrong.
Please tell me others also thought of the family card game scene in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days!! Bullllllshit, mama!
Okay the ballet sneakers… I am full on coveting them, and could use a new pair of sneakers that work with sundresses. But, won’t they smell horrible? Those nude mini socks always slide and i am too old to pull off the visible white socks look.
Try a pair of Ondo socks. They are the goat!
Same on all counts. I got a pair and splurged on some little mini socks and they are great with my ballet sneakers and don’t slide off at all. I can’t stop thinking they are kind of like foot condoms but I digress 😅
Sheer colourful metallic thread socks, ditsy floral socks, retro sporty socks, monogrammed socks. Make the socks a feature. You’ll look rad!
Dr. Scholl’s odor fighting insoles work great for me in my Rothys. You cut them to fit, and they last quite a while. I never even have a whiff of sweaty feet using them. :)
I have a bad case of Familial Hot Feet, and I find putting cedar shoe trees in my shoes when I’m not wearing them, and a few drops of cedar oil in my shoes when I am wearing them really helps.
ondo no show socks do not slip!!
As someone who grew up in a tropical humid place, here are my top tips for surviving heatwaves: 1. Instead of shorts and tank tops, wear flowy, loose fitting, natural fibers clothes that cover your body. Sun exposure on your skin will make you swelter more. Muslin, linen are your friends. Consider hot places in Middle East, South Asia and East Asia – people wear clothes that are loose and flowy. 2. Drink hot tea or any hot beverage for its evaporative cooling effect. 3. Same with spicy food. Snacking on cucumbers and watermelons sprinkled with salt and chili powder is not just refreshing but creates a cooling effect too. Or you can try cool beverages like lemonade or yogurt based drinks with green chilis. Stay cool everyone, we will get through this heatwave.
When I worked briefly in a village in a very hot part of Kenya my colleagues served piping hot tea during the most sweltering time of day, and swore it would cool you down. I don’t remember if it worked, but I enjoyed the tea regardless!
I bought a pair of gauze barrel leg pants at Old Navy last month and I have been LIVING in them. The problem is they are a bright yellow and white tropical pattern so it’s very obvious lol. I went online and found them in both black and white solid, and they arrived yesterday. I pair them with a slightly croppy tank, and amazingly it gives me more of a waist. Win win! This 61-year-old grandma feels hip and cute.
The drinking hot tea was a trick that my dear friend from Mongolia taught me! Works amazingly 🙌🏽
I made the hot dogs tonight and they were awesome!!!🤩 Happy 250th birthday America!! We love you so!
I’m also loving the ballerina sneaker trend. Adidas makes some cute ones!
Not to brag, but living in L.A. for 10+ years, I saw so many celebrities. But my favorite was hearing a *very* familiar laugh in an Islands in the Valley and turning around to see Julia Roberts in the next booth. Heatwave tips (see: living in L.A.) -If it’s safe to do so, open every window all night. Set fans in front of the windows and in the evening before bed, point the fans facing OUT to blow the hot air out. Then, before bed, turn the fans in to bring the cool air in. Close all the windows and blinds/curtains as soon as the temp hits 80 the next day. -Ceiling fans > tower fans > tabletop fans. Run ceiling fans low all day, tower fans at night pointed at your bed, tabletop fans as needed (like while working in front of a hot computer, ugh). -Buy bags of ice and dump them in the tub. Homemade ice bath, a la Cousin Colin in The Secret Garden (real ones know). -You can use an air fryer to cook (almost) anything you would normally make in the oven without heating up the house. -Room temp water hydrates you faster than cold water and can even help you feel cooler faster than ice-cold water. -Find places with AC if you don’t have your own: stores, libraries, malls, supermarkets, etc. -Embrace the sweat. Just accept it and it’s less annoying, I swear! (Mileage may vary: my husband doesn’t buy this one)
I think I would die running into Julia Roberts in an Islands lol!
Oh yes to the air fryer. The thought of turning on an oven, even with a/c, what a way to heat up a house. I also sometimes feel it is too hot for the air fryer. Those nights it is all salads: lobster cobb (lobster steamed on the grill burner early in the day), salmon nicoise (same with the grill) and caprese. My neighbor grows the most gorgeous, delicious heirloom tomatoes. She leaves them on my porch and I return to her house that evening with a caprese finished with basil from her herb windowsill garden. She gardens, I assemble salads!
I love your tips, but this one made me laugh – and feel sorry for us in NC/the south the past few weeks: “If it’s safe to do so, open every window all night. Set fans in front of the windows and in the evening before bed, point the fans facing OUT to blow the hot air out. Then, before bed, turn the fans in to bring the cool air in. Close all the windows and blinds/curtains as soon as the temp hits 80 the next day.” It has been in the upper 80s/90s even overnight here….so sad to not have the windows-open option!
I loved the playground article! This spring, my 8-year-old wrote a letter to her principal to urge the school’s need for a renovated playground that is accessible and inclusive of all children. She created a petition and got lots of support from students and teachers/staff. Her classmates worked together to create blueprints of the playground and to brainstorm ways they can raise money (primarily through a talent show but there were some other funny/sweet suggestions like auctioning off skateboards, upselling lemonade, and charging premium prices for front row seats at the show). The PTO is on board with helping. Now that it’s summer break, we are putting together a committee and a plan to make things happen. We’ll need to gather quotes from companies that could install inclusive equipment. Help the kids present to the Board of Education for approval. Seek donations or sponsorships from local businesses. Set up a campaign on a fundraising platform. Seek advice on ADA compliance and useful/beneficial pieces to include. Most importantly, we will seek out and encourage participation from members of the disability community. Beloved fellow COJ readers, what am I missing? What else do you recommend? I want so much for this to succeed.
Get an occupational therapist involved!
Just wanted to say this was so heartening to read, great job raising such a thoughtful child.
I’m not sure where you’re located, but check out Magical Bridge playgrounds! We live in the Bay Area and there are several near us (and I believe they’re contracted to work on some of the local school playgrounds as well). Accessible and novel playground equipment that suit many bodies and styles of play. My other note would be to add a sun shade to the budget if your area isn’t well covered already, since that will make the playground more accessible for all year-round.
Hey, Mo, my kids’ school redid the playground to be adaptive/inclusive after the building was retrofitted with an elevator. Our PTO president was a straight-up genius; among her many brilliant moves, she partnered with the city to recognize the school’s playground as a community park. That opened up enormous resources for our Title One school, but still gave the school control of the space when class was in session. Win-win!
Have you considered grant funding? There are a few sources that provide grant funding for playgrounds/outdoor play spaces (google KABOOM grant as an example, and there are others as well), and state/local governments offer funding to improve recreation/parks spaces, too. Depending on the grant source(s), the money could be used by the school for equipment, sure, but also for outreach and community building and community feedback efforts on the front end. Good luck!
You should be so proud of your daughter!
Sorry, you don’t already have disabled folks as part of this?
I’ve never done anything like that and I have no tips, but I wanted to say that I also want so much for this to succeed! Your daughter sounds like a badass.
A bit late seeing this, but I love the initiative and inclusivity the Youth are modeling! Have you reached out to your local news station(s)? They might like to cover the story and would get word to more folks in your community.
I just led a community initiative for returning to play-based learning in my town (Charlotte). We created our own instagram page and website. We also got a volunteer graphic designer to help us. We sent press releases to local media to get more attention. We created a GoFundMe. Good luck!
Wow that smitten kitchen recipe looks yummy! And I’ve never heard of Butterflied cut for hot dogs! I’ll have to try that on my veggie sausages :)
Ava I’m so glad you mentioned Hoff. I have 3 pairs! All time best sneakers for women that don’t like them
All hot dog afficionados should, at some point, make a pilgrimage to Puka Dog in Poipu on Kauai to pay homage to a great Hawai’ian delicacy: the Puka Dog. It’s a Polish sausage (or veggie dog) in a Hawai’ian sweet bread-style bun through which a center hole is baked. It’s finished with a garlic lemon secret sauce, a tropical-fruit relish, and Aunty Lilikoi mustard. Take it to the beach across the street and eat it while the sea turtles and seals come ashore as the sunsets. You’re welcome.
Wow. That could be a very fine Last Meal!
We just had this for the first time in June in Poipu! I loved it! But the turtles and seals chilling on the beach as the sun went down and everyone gave them their space was the BEST. Ahhhhh, so hard to leave Hawaii. Thank you for reminding me.
The best!!!!
What is the proof that Butcherbox meat is “humanely raised”? And what is their or your definition of “humanely raised”? If you look, there are plenty of articles debunking the myth of “humanely raised” farm animals. Really, if you want to eat meat, let’s not pretend there isn’t suffering involved.
ButcherBox guarantees that all its meat comes from humanely raised animals that are never given antibiotics or added hormones. Pork: All pork is Certified Humane®, raised crate-free, and provided space to behave naturally. Beef: ButcherBox features 100% grass-fed and grass-finished beef that is raised on open pastures. Chicken & Turkey: Their poultry is either Certified Humane® or G.A.P.-rated, and free-range or organic, ensuring access to the outdoors. I hear you that there is always some suffering involved. When it comes to raising them, however, these animals have open pastures, space to move, no crates and cages, etc. Hope this helps xo
What a gracious response, Joanna.
Exactly, we can lie to make ourselves feel better but there is no humane animal agriculture. Even cage free or free range is a lie where yes, animals might not technically be in a cage, but are confined to very small spaces per animal. I understand needing advertisement revenue, but platforming meat in a worldwide heat crisis isn’t great.
I hear you and agree with you Lee
Lee, I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s simply no such thing as humane animal products. Even if they have reasonably happy lives, the animals are still removed from their moms, and the ones who don’t turn a profit (male chicks, older chickens, “expired” dairy cows, and male calves) are killed. All animals killed for their meat spend the last couple weeks of life in the most miserable, torturous conditions imaginable (since “humane” farms outsource the slaughter). The animals know what’s happening and it’s pure terror. If folks have the means to not eat animals (or their products, which is the same godawful industry), it’s simply a kinder way of life.
Thank you for your response, Joanna. I recommend researching these euphemisms further, as I am alarmed how easily we accept these claims so we can eat meat without a guilty conscious. If you are curious to learn more about the actual circumstances permitted for “free range” and “humanely raised” animals, take a look at this article: https://www.peta.org/issues/animals-used-for-food/free-range-organic-meat-myths/ An excerpt: Animals on typical organic and “free-range” farms often spend much of their time confined to crowded sheds or mud-filled pens, just as animals on conventional factory farms do. While the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) requires animals on so-called “free-range” farms to have access to outdoor areas, it doesn’t specify how much time they must be allowed to spend outside or how much space they should be given. Cows on organic dairy farms can be kept in crowded sheds, mired in their own waste, much like cows on factory dairy farms. They, too, are artificially impregnated every year, and their calves are taken from them soon after birth. Cows on organic farms often aren’t given antibiotics—even when they’re sick or when their udders become infected, something that happens often—because medicated animals lose their “organic” status. Animals on organic and “free-range” farms often endure the same cruel mutilations—such as debeaking, dehorning, and castration without painkillers—as animals on conventional factory farms. Cattle, for example, generally have their horns cut off and their testicles cut out of their scrotums, and many are branded with searing-hot irons. Pigs on organic farms often have their tails cut off and their ears notched, and some have rings forced into their sensitive noses in order to prevent them from rooting in the grass and dirt, which is a favorite pastime of pigs. Chickens on organic egg farms usually have part of their sensitive beaks cut off, which causes them both acute and chronic pain.
I’m with you on this, Lee! Thanks for pointing that out
I know nothing of Butcherbox, but this reminds me of something. I used to work at a Butcher Shop while I was in college, and the shop partnered with local farms. My boss thought it was important for us to take a field trip to the farm on the day the animals are killed – so that we could see the living conditions, meet the farmers, and know the process. I was not thrilled about going, and thought I would be done eating meat. However, that isn’t what happened. I left feeling reflective. Grateful for the people who steward their land and farms well and who make sure the animals in their care only have one bad day. Also, thankful to the animals for the nourishment they provide.
I really appreciate this comment, Lee. There is nothing humane about a bolt of electricity in the head or being suffocated. The humane “certification” is not an outside certification from a humane organization but a greenwashing from within the big agricultural system. It’s not honest. “Pork” is individual pigs: mothers and piglets. There is nothing natural about being separated from each other soon after birth and slaughtered at 6 months. “Beef” is individual cows, the sweetest animals. “Poultry” is highly personable chickens and turkeys who coo to each other in the morning. There is no way that my meal is worth even a moment of suffering of these animals. And it’s a lifetime.
Hear hear Lee. Meat production is brutal. End of.
I’m a starving African. I eat meat.
Thank you for this, Lee.
Lee said it.
I am always impressed and amazed by Joanna’s gracious response to comments like this. I marvel at the respect and patience she extends to those who hurl outrage, insults, and accusations, as expressed in the cluster of comments here (accusations of lying, inhumanity motivated by financial gain, delusional thinking, etc ).
Thank you for this Lee. Long ago I heard this question, “what would happen if animals could speak to us?” I think about the answers every day. I’ve never regretted my childhood decision to not eat animals, growing up on a ranch (free range, grass fed, as humane as any cows are raised anywhere – it’s a contradiction but ranchers love their cattle, and, they send them to slaughter) i knew perfectly well where meat comes from. I don’t judge others plates, or consciences, but I don’t like the hypocrisy of not owning your choices by white washing what they really are. Most meat eaters i know hunt (and myself before i stopped). They look that deer or elk in the eye and pull the trigger. They saw it alive and peaceful, and then they killed it. And they’ll field dress it and gut it too. To eat. I have FAR more respect for that. They won’t tell you it’s humane or not cruel – it’s literally beside the point to them. It’s food. But those animals truly were running free, having happy lives, and knew no terror.
Thanks, Joanna. Many people will ear meat, and it is very positive to support producers that provide a humane option. It’s great if a person can be a vegetarian or vegan, but many people won’t be and humanely raised is a much better option than industrial farms.
Neither Johana nor Butcher Box is claiming there is no suffering involved. They are citing they are ‘humanely raised’ not ‘no suffering anywhere ever.’ I have been vegan for over 20 years and while I am not comfortable eating or using animal products, I am 100% on board with people who do choose to eat animal products support companies / farmers who are treating the animals as well as possible. Also this is a lifestyle blog that COJ keeps free to all through partnerships with brands, and she continues to choose less evil brands that reflect her values.
I disagree that there is no such thing as humanely raised farm animals. I live on a mountain that over looks a small to medium working ranch. I’ve witnessed every season and ranch activity. These cows have a nice life: wide, open grass land grazing, calves running around like a pack of cousins, views of the surrounding mountains if they so desire, transfers to higher pastures in the summer.. They are cared for very diligently in the winter by the ranchers, who are both men and women. They also are never transferred to a feedlot. There are many ranches like this is my gorgeous state of montana.
I also want to add that cows in montana are not kept in tight sheds. I’ve never heard of that practice here.
Bless you! This seems like a circular, moral conversation if we enter into it. If I were to answer honestly and say “I eat meat and I know there is suffering involved” then the potential rebuttal is “well how can you justify that?” One of the challenges of life is that people have different values and understanding of levels of morality. It sounds like you might be looking for others to justify their choices based on your own personal morals. We’re all free to do that, but it’s difficult to engage with.
The presence or lack of antibiotics is of interest to me lately. A close friend who grew up on a poultry farm taught me that one of the many requirements for “organic” or other labels is NO ANTIBIOTICS. Ever. Even if the animals are sick. Which means not only might they be uncomfortable/suffering to an extent, but that many more animals (entire flocks) are killed to prevent greater transmission. Farmers don’t have the time to pull out individual birds and nurse them back to health. Anyhow – that bit of information gave me perspective I didn’t have before, as a vegetarian-since-age-12 and more recently monthly-chicken-eater.
I wish more places that sell hotdogs would offer a vegetarian version! It’s not that hard to find them and it would open up a revenue line from yours truly.
Here here! I’m someone who does eat meat on occasion, but am genuinely thrilled by a vegetarian option. I can imagine how disappointing it must be for dedicated vegetarians out there. Thank goodness we’re making progress.
Returning to the workforce after a year and a half, a lot has changed in the job hunt process from the last time I looked over 10 years ago (ie. using AI to update resume/cover letter for ATS filters, applying through chat bots!). I’ve been applying through Indeed and employer career pages, but haven’t gotten any interviews despite a solid project manager resume. It’s discouraging and I’m probably not alone in this. Does the wonderful CoJ hive mind have recommendations for what career sites have worked for you to find a job in the last year or so? Or if you are the one hiring, where do you post your job openings these days?
I work in the A/E/C industry so this might not work for you but- I always tell people to join whatever the regional professional org is (example, AIA Chicago) and to attend networking events, volunteer at events, and the like. If you don’t have a LinkedIn account, it might be worth making one and choosing the ‘looking for work’ option. We hire through a variety of methods – industry specific recruiters, Handshake (which is through colleges/universities), sometimes other industry specific sites and we got our excellent admin via Craigslist – but just be very careful because there are a lot of scams out there on CL. In general I am going to say network and let everyone you know be aware of your job search. Most people we’ve hired in the past few years have found us through current staff or through other industry colleagues. I’ve given my biz cards to our bank teller so her grandson could email me, and to Lyft drivers looking for work in our field. You just never know. Good luck!
Hang in there Sarah! Super tough these days – I was in the same boat you were last summer and probably submitted 100 resumes to get about 6 interviews (several with so many rounds) and one offer. Without benefits.( That said, I do love the place I now work). It was a little shocking. If you DM me I might have a couple alternative career sites ( though no magic bullet unfortunately). I found that Indeed, LinkedIn and tall hose ubiquitous sites were not good at all.
I hear you, I’m going to jump back into the search myself soon and am weary already – it seems like more than ever, it’s who you know: my friend loves this book “the two hour job search” because it’s focused on making real connections with real people, so you’re not wasting time sending applications into an internet black hole. https://2hourjobsearch.com/
Sarah, I went back to work almost 2 years ago but started coming across the same thing! 2 things 1) LinkedIn was not great, so many bots and fake ads and probably scams. I was actually scammed but through my email! I thought ThermoFisher was hiring me, it was sooo creepy and felt so real, but was a major scam. 2) I would just go directly to the employer job site!!! Google search companies that match your experience/skills. And contact those employers directly about the postings if a contact is posted!
You are not alone!! I was on the hunt earlier this year and it was brutal. LinkedIn is an absolute cesspool and I have never had any luck applying to job from there. I actually spent a lot more time networking and having conversations with people in my network letting them know I was looking and asking them to put me in touch with others in their network etc. This helps you find out about jobs before they are posted in some cases. I also think it’s much more likely to get a interview from submitting an app/ resume via an actual company website vs job board and also after or while applying for these jobs messaging recruiters / employers at said company on LinkedIn. Other general advice that helped me was literally telling everyone I knew I was looking, being open, and not being shy in asking for help/ calling in favors. Rooting for you, Sarah!
A recruiter recommended Sam Struan’s Youtube channel to me – he has wonderful posts about how to craft your resume and your LinkedIn profile. Including one called How To Write a Project Manager Resume by a Recruiter. I follow him on LinkedIn and find him so insightful. Matthew Wohl is another recruiter who’s worth following on LinkedIn – again for insights, and to see his comments on other posts. It’s possible to book him for a resume review and rewrite for around $200 if I’m not mistaken. Connect with people on Linkedin at the companies that interest you. React or comment on their posts. Figure out who the HR people are at these companies and connect with them, too. Then you can close the loop if and when a job posting comes up, sending them each a brief note. You’ll be putting yourself ahead of the people who are just blindly sending a resume via Indeed, etc. Good luck!
Wow, thank you so much for this really helpful advice! I’ll be taking each of your recommendations, and also, carrying this feeling of encouragement and connection from you into reaching out to friends and past colleagues. Thank you!
Aw, I love that 100th birthday photo. My grandpa turned 100 last year, and we threw him a BANGER —100 guests showed up! My sister snapped one of my favorite photos of all time: him with my one-year-old daughter. It feels like the entire human experience summed up in a single picture. Sadly, he passed away this past December, but what an incredible life he lived. Here’s the pic :) https://imgur.com/a/FXI5qj6
my sympathies for your loss, the lose ofa beloved grandparent can be very hard, even when they’ve lived a long and incredible life. I’m glad you were able to celebrate him in style and that picture is an absolute GEM!
How lovely are they?? I’m so glad he could be celebrated – and not just during the party, I’m sure. That feeling of connection with one’s community seems like it can make a world of difference for seniors.
That is a fantastic photo, and I totally see the resemblance, at least in the pose!
That photo! Thank you for sharing – it is so moving
I love that picture, Molly!
So so beautiful, Molly! Thank you for sharing!
I couldn’t love that picture more!!
Today I was working at my local coffee shop (Liz’s Book Bar in Brooklyn) and a pair of friends were opposite me, catching up. One woman said to the other “you look amazing!” and the other responded, “thanks, I dropped a man.” I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop (plus, I was working!) but I couldn’t help but hear snippets of the convo. She sounded so happy. I wanted to go up to her later to say something about how amazing my life has been since my marriage ended, but there wasn’t a good moment, and I didn’t want to be weird. I’m thinking of her, and sending her “the best summer of my life” vibes – and same to anyone else who needs it. Happy Independence Day weekend!
haha oh my gosh I love this. and I love liz’s book bar, hope to see you there sometime christie!
Not sure why but I just knew that the hot dogs you’d love were going to be some dachshaunds in a kiddie pool! I was taken back to follow the link to actual food haha. Have a great weekend and thanks, as always, for years and years, for a weekend post I will linger over.
Oops *dachshund not whatever vowel-happy word I wrote!
When I was very pregnant with my summer baby, our a/c broke. Bless my husband for staying married to me because I was miserable and therefore making everyone else in my house miserable too. He put a bowl of ice in front of a fan so I could sleep and it worked so well!
There is a hot dog shop by me in Haddonfield, NJ. It is called Hidden Dogs. They put the dog into a roll and use delicious sauces. My favorite is the Horsefeather Dog which has a horseradish sauce and potato chips! https://www.yelp.com/biz/the-hidden-dog-haddonfield-2
Re celebs in restaurants – our family was in a Spanish restaurant in Boston (home town) and my Dad and I were facing my Mom, Brother and young Sister across our table. Mom and Bro start giving us weird looks and whispering, “Stanley Tucci! Stanley Tucci!” through closed mouths… Dad and I were like, “huh? what?” They got louder and more insistent, “Stanley Tucci! Stanley Tucci!” and began jerking their heads in our direction. So, of course, Dad and I turn around (with zero finesse) to see Mr. Tucci and his dining companions sitting right behind us. It has been over 25 years and we still laugh about this.
Idk this is gonna sound weird but I’ve worked in Boston for nearly 15 years now and I have worked closely with three (different?!) men who were Stanley Tucci doppelgängers.
We saw Stanley Tucci once too–about 12 years ago! We were at the Orangerie in Paris, in one of the water lilies rooms, and there he was, looking hella stylish. We kept waiting for a movie to come out about Monet that he was in but I don’t think one ever did. I guess he was just playing tourist like the rest of us!
@Jules – hilarious! I can vouch that it really was the official Stanley Tucci but I agree there are a lot of lookalikes in the Boston area for some reason!
Haha, Stanley Tucci was recently spotted in my town (very randomly as it’s a small place in the north of England, but it was definitely him!) but I didn’t see him. I’ve now trained my daughter to a be a Stanley Tucci detection device and she points out every short, bald, dashing man with glasses just in case.
1- WOW that playground article!! Will donate to Trust for Public Land in honor of my littles’ summer birthdays. 2- If you like those hot dogs, you will love Colombian-style hot dogs – potato chips! Pink sauce! If you want to go further, pineapple sauce. 3- re: summer movies – My husband and I were watching Jaws as I was in early labor with my son, and we have watched it the night before this birthday every year since. Now that he’s turning 12, he’ll be watching with us tonight! Lol I am still terrified every time even though I know what’s going to happen, but he insists he’ll be fine.
a pink basketball court. such a simple ask and such a BIG change/BIG good. whew. i love it.
I did sit next the the REAL Jay-Z at a restaurant in NYC in the early aughts. He was really friendly and both our tables chatted back and forth. One of my peak living in NYC moments. I wish I could remember the name of the place….(downtown with light up bathrooms).
I also once saw Jay-Z have a sweet interaction with fans outside the old Rihga Royal in midtown. They took pics with him using a disposable camera (pre smartphone days)!
As a Trust for Public Land employee- THANK YOU for sharing the NYT story on our community schoolyard program! I’ve attended some of the student participatory design sessions and it is an absolute joy to see kids get excited about creating their own dream outdoor spaces. If you want to support this work and park and trail creation across the country, become a Trust for Public Land member!
This is such a great idea! These kids really came up with good ideas and look like they are having a blast, and the fact that boys ASK if they can use the pink hoops court says so much. (I want a “ground is lava!” area on the university campus where I work. Students would be on it all the time.)
Not wanting to yuck anyone else’s yum, but does anyone else feel like…. WHAT is going on with these footwear trends these days, people?! The mesh, the jellies, now ballet sneakers? Even just the simple black flip flop trend has me wondering… why??
hahahaha
Even my feet are hot in menopause, lol, so the more I see the mesh, the more I want it :)
I’m with you on the jellies and ballet sneakers. I don’t get them at all. But living in a tropical climate, I am team flip flop all the way!
I had the good fortune to find mesh trainers 15 years ago, I wore them until there was no sole left. I do not often think about fashion, but I remember those trainers. Nowadays, if they would come in my size, I would buy those 3x: https://thehoffbrand.com/fr-fr/products/bridge-fishnet-chocolate. Just wow! PS: Heather, I think your shoetrendquestion is my whydoalldressesilikehavesillypuffedsleevesthatmakemelooklikepuffedpastry? So I get you :)
The ugly Camper sandals?!?!?
Call me when you have serious foot problems. Your needs change, sometimes during the course of a day. Changing the shape of shoes when you work on your feet often helps immensely, too. The best-looking shoes are often torture for bunions, PF, flat feet, pronation, et cet. Ugly shoes are necessary.