Our Holy-Grail Hair Products
Last month, our team shared our skincare routines. (It was SUCH a treat hearing readers’ recs in the comments, too; I screenshotted all the lip balm suggestions!) Today, we decided to do the same for hair: our daily routines, our favorite products, and the little tricks we’ve learned along the way. Here goes…
Alison Piepmeyer, Partnerships Director
How would you describe your hair?
My hair is one of the things I really like about myself. It’s wavy/curly with lots of texture. It usually cooperates with whatever look I’m trying to pull off, which I appreciate!
Tell us about a typical morning.
Depends on my mood and energy level. Sometimes I’ll do a full curly-girl routine (with a microfiber towel, mousse, defining cream, and hair wrap). But that takes a while. So, I usually let it air dry into loose waves — that way I can stretch washes longer, along with dry shampoo. I used to part it down the middle, but lately I’ve been copying Natasha Pickowicz’s half-up style.
What kind of detangler do you use?
I love the T3 paddle brush because the bristles are spaced far enough apart that they detangle my hair without ruining the curl pattern. (Curly hair can get very poofy very quickly.)
What’s your wash routine?
I wash my hair only once or twice a week, because curly hair gets dry so easily. I also color my hair, so less frequent washing makes the color last longer. I rotate between a few shampoos: Nizoral (for dandruff and hair-loss prevention), a purple shampoo and conditioner (when my blonde starts getting brassy), and Odele shampoo and conditioner for regular washes, because it’s acne-safe (I have acne-prone skin, and I’m very strict about this!).
Air-dry or blow-dry?
Mostly air-dry. If I’m doing the curly-girl method, I’ll diffuse it, but otherwise it dries into slightly chaotic waves that I’ll clean up with this straightener.
Do you have a favorite hair-styling trick?
Following hairstylists on Instagram has taught me everything. Ashley Streicher completely changed how I use a flat iron. Amber Yackzan has great styling tips for bobs. Sophie Marie taught me “The Bowl Method” for curly hair.
Do you have a nighttime hair routine?
If my hair is curly, I’ll sleep in a silk bonnet to help preserve the curls and prevent frizz. Otherwise, I throw it up in a silk scrunchy and fix the waves in the morning.
Do you have a hero hair product?
Living Proof dry shampoo forever! I use it constantly, since I go a while between washes.
Any other treatments?
I have a lot of grays, and my hairstylist explained that blonde highlights are the easiest way to blend them naturally. The grow-out is softer, which means I can go much longer between salon visits.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
Do. Not. Cut. Bangs. I’ve been laughing because all the online hair girlies are obsessed with Mika Abdalla’s haircut on the new show Off Campus. But thank god for PSAs like this, you’re doing the Lord’s work.
Christine Pride, Columnist
How would you describe your hair?
Long and thick. Also: reliable. I’ve had the same simple hair “style” (if you can call it that) for decades, and though sometimes I want to chop it all off, I’ll take my steady, familiar hairdo over novelty.
Do you have a go-to style?
I have exactly two hair looks: a top knot/bun (80% of the time), or blown out waves (20% of the time). Maybe — MAYBE — you’ll catch me with a side braid, if I’m feeling wild.
What kind of brush do you use?
My hair tangles easily, so I use this Tangle Teezer brush, which is good for gently working out snarls and smoothing my hair out.
What does your wash routine look like?
Boring and low-maintenance: I use TRESemmé Curl Shampoo and Conditioner, then slap on Nourish & Shine and Ouidad Leave-In Conditioner for extra moisture.
Air-dry or blow-dry?
Blowing it dry myself takes 193 hours. So, if I want a really good blowout, I go to Blo Bar. Their blowouts last me five precious days.
Do you have a before-bed hair routine?
If my hair has been blown out, I sleep with it in a bun in this blue bonnet — it’s very sexy.
Do you have a hero hair tool?
I tried the Rev Air for a hot second. It’s basically a vacuum meets a blow dryer. But it didn’t give me dramatic results, despite the amazing before-and-after photos all over the internet. Not a hero product, but I thought it worth mentioning, because there’s a lot of hype around this thing!
Any other treatments you regularly do?
I get my hair chemically straightened four times a year, like clockwork. And now I’ve added a color rinse to the routine, to cover grays. I can’t do these treatments at the same time, so it makes for eight annual visits to the salon! (Shout out Beauty Bar in Harlem.) At home, I try to use this deep conditioner for 10 minutes, once a week, so my hair doesn’t get too damaged from the aforementioned treatments.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
It’s only hair.
Jannelle Sanchez, Senior Editor
How would you describe your hair?
Very full and very long. My hair also has a slight natural wave (for those who use hair charts, mine is 2b).
How do you do your hair in the morning?
I wash my hair every three days. For the first two days, I’ll wear my hair down and tousled. I’ll comb out any tangles, smooth frizzy bits with my straightener, and leave the rest untouched so the waves stay intact. Three days post-wash, my hair is oilier, so I comb it out and pull it into a sleek, middle-part ponytail. I’ll top it off with a layer of hairspray. The smell always makes me think of my grandma getting ready for work.
What kind of brush do you use?
I’ve been using the same wide paddle brush for eight years!
Tell us about your wash routine.
For the past two years, I’ve boughtthe jumbo pack of Nexxus Advanced Hydration Therappe Humectress Shampoo and Conditioner from Costco, and it worked well. But just this week I tested out Hairstory’s Air Dry Kit, and I was shocked by the results. I used the pre-wash and cleansing cream, and as soon as I looked in the mirror — my hair still soaking wet — I could see more defined waves. The next morning, my hair was super soft and looked extra voluminous.
Air-dry or blow-dry?
Air dry. And for date nights or special occasions, I like to curl my hair with this big curling iron. I love the glamorous look of barrel curls!
Do you have a favorite styling trick?
When I was six, I was over at a friend’s house when her mom mentioned that we should brush our hair before showering. And omg, that was life-changing! You know how hard it is to work shampoo into tangled wet hair?! Ever since that playdate, I’ve brushed my hair first.
What’s your nighttime hair routine?
Honestly? Nothing. With three kids under five, I’m lucky to get my washes in!
Do you have a hero hair tool?
A toothbrush! I have lots of postpartum baby-hair bangs, so when I want sleek hair, I’ll spray my roots with hairspray and then go over my hair with a toothbrush, smoothing down all the fly-aways and baby hairs. It works like magic.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
It took me 20 years to learn which hairstyles work with my face shape — and which I don’t. I can rock a bob. I can rock bangs. I can_not_ rock a fully slicked back ponytail, or straightened hair with a middle part. Learning this has saved me from many crabby days and salon meltdowns.
Joanna Goddard, Founder and Editor
How would you describe your hair?
Straight and fine. And my grays are definitely coming in!
How do you do your hair on a typical morning?
Wash, air-dry, and that’s it. I used to blow it dry every single morning, and my hair would get damaged. Now that I’m doing less with it, my hair feels softer and smoother.
What kind of brush/comb do you use?
I use this comb when my hair is wet. (I don’t want a brush to break my hair.) But when it’s dry, I use the Mason Pearson brush that my aunt gave me — it was my English grandmother’s, and I remember seeing it on her bedside table during my whole childhood. Hair stylists always say how amazing boar bristles are for your hair — and I do as I’m told.
What does your wash routine look like?
I wash my hair every day (I know!). I use RÔZ shampoo and conditioner, and then I comb RÔZ milk hair serum through my damp hair (I’m very brand-loyal when it comes to their hair stuff). I’ll scrunch it in my hand, while it’s drying, which gives me a bit of a bed-head wave.
Do you have a favorite styling trick?
No, I’m useless! But if I take an overnight flight, I’ll bring a baseball cap for the next morning — it makes me feel like an actress in the airport to have a baseball cap over my greasy hair.
Do you have a nighttime/before-bed hair routine?
Honestly, I just read my book and pass out. Right now I’m reading It’s a Lot by Alison Leiby, which is so great — she wrote a big chapter on being an only child.
Any other treatments you regularly do?
I get my hair cut by my friend Reagan Baker — named after Ronald Reagan, like the ’80s kid she is. Her haircuts are a splurge, but they fall so beautifully without any styling, and they grow out so well that I only need to get two a year. Then I get my grays covered by Aliya at Fox & Jane in Brooklyn. She’s young but super talented.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
For me, less is more. My hair is so much healthier now that I mostly leave it alone.
Kaitlyn Teer, Senior Editor
How would you describe your hair?
Thick and wavy.
Do you have a go-to style?
I have a razor-cut shag with thick bangs (I go to a stylist who specializes in razor cuts, like the ones made popular by Edo Salon). The cut works really well with my wavy texture and means I don’t have to do any additional styling. I can just wash and air-dry!
What kind of brush/comb do you use?
I brush out my waves before showering, and afterward I use a wide-tooth comb on damp hair.
What does your wash routine look like?
I’ve used Hairstory’s New Wash and Hair Balm for years. I also use an anti-dandruff shampoo once a month, to keep my scalp healthy.
Do you have a favorite styling hack?
I apply Hair Balm while my hair is still dripping wet, to lock in moisture (a tip I got from Samin Nosrat). It reduces frizz and makes my waves look defined.
Do you have a nighttime hair routine?
I always sleep in a messy bun, with my bangs pinned back — I can’t stand the feeling of hair on my face when I’m sleeping! On a typical morning, I shake out my bun and smooth out my bangs. If I’ve got some real bedhead, I’ll wet my bangs for a fresh start.
Do you have a hero tool?
My stylist encouraged me to get my own feather-styling razor so I could trim my bangs at home whenever I got the urge! I’m always taking off a little here, a little there, to keep them on point.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
I’ve learned never to put my trust in an inspiration photo! Never! It led to so much heartbreak when I was younger. Now, if I’m looking to change things up, I bring in like 10 reference photos to communicate the vibe I’m going for. But I’ve also come to accept that my hair is always going to look like my hair, not anyone else’s.
Kelsey Miller, Senior Editor
How would you describe your hair?
Super-fine, but a ton of it. It’s silky, which is nice, but I’m often trying to rough it up a bit to create a little texture.
How do you do your hair on a typical morning?
Most days, I just rake out the tangles and go, then I almost always wind up in a ponytail by 11 a.m. I genuinely love my hair, but having it around my face distracts me! Even on my wedding day, our photographer had to kindly remind me to stop tucking my hair behind my ears.
What kind of brush/comb do you use?
I am obsessed with the UNBrush detangling brush. I initially bought it for my daughter, who has curly hair. I thought $18 was a little steep for a plastic brush, but the reviews were incredible — and frankly, I’d have paid anything for a brush if you told me it would make bedtime brushing less scream-y. Let me tell you, that $18 piece of plastic lived up to the hype! And it’s just as incredible on my heap of fine hair. It takes care of tangles without ripping. It’s the only brush I’ll use on either of us now.
What does your wash routine look like?
I’m a wash-every-day person, like Joanna (I also know!). I shower at night, and for the last couple years, I’ve used Herbal Essences Grapefruit Volume Shampoo and Conditioner. It rinses clean and conditions very well, but it doesn’t add weight or residue. I’m a lifelong drugstore-shampoo advocate.
Do you have a favorite hair-styling trick or hack?
I just learned this hair-tuck trick on TikTok, and I wish someone had shown me it years ago. It’s the one thing that actually does allow me to keep my hair down without feeling the constant urge to tuck it behind my ears or pull it into a ponytail.
Do you have a before-bed hair routine?
I have an extremely glamorous sleep-on-totally-wet-hair method. If I do manage to let my hair dry before going to sleep, the pineapple-bun method is great. As a kid, I’d braid my hair to prevent tangles, but this is even better. Also, I’m a side-sleeper, and it genuinely makes sleeping more comfortable.
Do you have a hero hair product or tool?
For the past decade, Iles Formula Finishing Hair Serum has been the only styling product I use. I rub a tiny dollop between my hands, then finger-comb it through the bottom half of my hair. It’s the one product that actually smooths without overwhelming my fine hair and creating greasy-looking clumps. It’s definitely my most expensive hair product, but the bottle lasts me around two years. My other hero is toddler hair ties, which are made of magic sweatshirt-esque fabric and are soooo gentle on your hair.
Any other treatments?
I get a haircut once a year, and that’s all she wrote. I don’t have the patience for salon hair coloring, but I do love to mess around with tinted conditioners at home. The Christophe Robin copper conditioner is sooooo pretty and easy (on my hair, it just adds a little warmth). It’s the most user-friendly type I’ve tried — meaning, it doesn’t leave neon stains on my skin when I inevitably smear it on my forehead.
What’s the biggest haircare lesson you’ve learned?
YOLO. Get the cut, try the perm, do that Angela Chase dye job your inner child’s been pining for. Hair is never permanent (nothing is, right?), so why the heck not?
How do you like to do your hair these days? Any tricks or products you swear by?
P.S. Nine women on going gray, and a super-easy hair trend (that’s great for summer heat too).
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Comments
164 commentsI love this series. For the final trifecta post, can we do your skincare routines?
Tangle teaser brushes are amazing! I love that it’s easy to get the hair out of them. Anyone else get the hair/tufts of towel stuck to their brushes with little balls at the end of the bristles? I threw my last one out and made the switch and I’m glad I did!
The Mason Pearson brush is $400. Is it really worth that?? Because I keep things forever but also that’s more than I ever knew brushes could cost so I need to be sure…
No – it’s just high cost because it’s a luxury, handmade brush that has been around since 1885. In the 1970’s, it cost $25. In the 90’s, $100. Now – out of control. However, if you want one, try finding it online via Costco, which will cost less. But no one “needs” this brush lol
I bet you can find a used one on Poshmark.
I love seeing others own that they wash every day. Having someone try to explain to me that I should train my hair to handle less washing drives me crazy. It’s so fine and I’m an oily person. Not that I don’t also go days sometimes if I’m home but it’s disgusting and it cannot/will not be trained. Keep doing what you need to!
I take a low dose 50mg of spironolactone and it has helped with my scalp so much.
I need to understand more about the bowl method – how and why do you start with damp hair and then wet it again? Could you do the same coming out of the shower instead of doing the bowl? I have similar hair to Alison’s and very curious….
I want to be Christine Pride. I love her take on anything.
Two questions for the group and tip! 1. Air drying – My hair literally takes HOURS to air dry and it usually turns out frizzy. I live in the South, so maybe the humidity extends the drying time? How do you go out in the world without having a wet head? I cannot imagine going into the office with wet hair. 2. Periodic Washes – Are you all just allowing the sweat to dry and go about your business? (Or are you not doing sweaty exercise which is totally fair. Haha) 3. A tip! I have some hairs in the front and along my part that stand straight up and it looks crazy. I use clear mascara to swipe the hair down and it looks totally natural and stays! No crunchy looking hairspray and it gets the product only where it’s needed. When the clear mascara runs out, I’ve been able to (very carefully!) squirt gel in to the mascara tube and keep using it. It’s nice because the mascara tube scrapes most of the gel off the bristles so you have just enough to do the job without it getting gloopy.
I also live in a humid city and I guess I just don’t care about leaving the house with wet hair? I dry it as best as I can with a towel and then off I go if I’m in a hurry!
@Laura I live in Miami (humidity central) and I air-dry exclusively. I never go to the office with a wet head (I’m five days a week in a office) I will either: Wash my hair before bed and sleep with it in a bonnet. Still wake up with slightly damp hair, but air dries quickly before I leave. (Note I wake up super early and my commute is on only 15 minutes so a good two hours before I leave.) I always get compliments on my hair in meetings when I do this. Take a very early shower and wash my hair. Let air dry before bed and wear a bonnet. Or if I’m feeling wild, no bonnet and see what I get. I have curly hair and only wash it twice a week (more if there’s a pool/ocean or crazy amount of sweat involved). I always put product on it while it’s wet and I NEVER EVER touch my hair when it’s drying. Cardinal sin of curls. My 12 yo daughter is dying to do a REAL curl routine on me, but honestly I’m scared of all her internet beauty knowledge and I like the way my hair is. :)
I used to wash my hair every day and then do what Jules describes (dry as best I can but go to work with wet hair). It was always dry after a few hours and looked great. I didn’t really care. I suppose it depends on where you work and what you do.
Wait! I’ve been dying to find a great product to keep my wavy hair from getting frizzy when air drying! None of your air dry/wavy hair folks mentioned what they use. Can we ask them?!?!
Seconding this!
Mine is straight/wavy and I use the serum from Giovanni. I’m not aiming for perfection but it does the trick!
If you have gray/white hair and want it to be brighter/less brassy, I highly recommend giving Loreal Heavy Metal Detox shampoo and conditioner a try. I tried the purple shampoos and they were helpful, but when a stylist used the Loreal Heavy Metal Detox stuff on my hair, it was a noticeable difference and I started it using it immediately. Shout out to all my silver sisters! If you’re considering going gray, just stick with it long enough to see what it really will look/feel like. My hair is so much healthier and softer now that I’m not coloring, and it no longer frizzes when I blow dry it. I love it.
Would love to see some tips for short hair!
Same!!
I go 2-3 days between washes. Would go longer but I can’t stand the sebum smell of unwashed scalp. Does dry shampoo help with that? I have erratically wavy hair that goes curly with some careful air drying and scrunching but flattens out completely if I so much as look at a hat. Products I’ve used for ages: – R&Co Perfect Hair shampoo and conditioner. Smell great and don’t aggravate my sensitive scalp, but need a stronger clarifying wash occasionally for build up. – Mr. Smith curl creme. Also smells good and is easy to use.
If your scalp is smelling, you might benefit from a dandruff shampoo and more frequent washing. It worked for me to get rid of the bacteria causing the smell. I don’t love washing my hair more often, but worth it overall. I think dry shampoo would just sit on top of the bacteria and would not be helpful in the long run.
Here for the Angela Chase reference!
Looking for advice! I have pretty thick hair and it’s always been very consistent and one of the things I really love about myself. As someone with some chronic health issues, its also been close to the only consistent part of my body. I’ve noticed over the past few months it’s started to thin along my part and right alongside it, to the point of looking patchy and having some bald spots. I can cover it up sort of by wearing my hair a certain way but it’s otherwise pretty evident. I’m trying to remind myself it’s just hair but it’s been hard on my confidence and self esteem. I’m only 32! Is this my future!? My mom’s side of the family deals with balding but I thought I’d have longer or that I’d avoid it. I was considering trying out a more gender affirming hair style this summer but the length is part of what’s helping me hide this so I tossed that plan out the window which is also making me feel a sorta way (gender is weird!). Any tips? On regrowing? On how to style this? On coping with this? I’ll take anything!
See your doctor! This could be something medical that needs to be worked up like your thyroid or iron levels. I was on an RA med that caused hair loss- increasing my protein intake and using nizoral shampoo and peptide hair serum helped with regrowth.
Ditching elastics (mostly) in favor of pencils, chopsticks or French twist thingies has helped my hairline a lot.
About 10 months ago I had a very similar discovery to you- patches of extreme thinning! Mine was around the part (middle, top of head) and the hairline. I decided to throw everything at the wall in the hopes that it would work because it was honestly devastating to my confidence! I had blood work done and I was definitely low iron. So I made sure to take a gentle mid-high dose of iron every night before bed (away from meals) so nothing could interfere with its absorption. On top of that I took a b complex every morning, (plus vitamin d, fish oil) I also realized I was failing to eat enough protein each day so I started actually weighing out portions of meat/fish to ensure I got a minimum of 100g per day of complete protein but most days I aimed for 120. It’s more than you think lol!! But I told myself I’d just commit to it and reevaluate in 8 months. Oh – and hair Roth serums every night – various ones, I keep switching it up! And I’m absolutely delighted to say that it’s working!!! I no longer have those thin patches – the baby hairs seemed to pop up out of nowhere around 6 months – and all of a sudden they were just fully there. Im going to keep this up and hope that in a year or two my hair will be back to its youthful glory lol. Sharing in case any of this resonates with you and I’m praying you find your solution too! Re: your haircut – maybe ask your stylist what they think! Maybe there’s a way they can cut it that gives you that gender affirming cut you’re dreaming of in a way that’s flattering to the current state of your hair. And totally get wanting that haircut – hair is sooo influential to our state of being lol. I wish it wasn’t but it just holds a lot of power over us!
Hi there! I am 36 and similarly have always had very thick hair. In the last year I noticed I was beginning to get a receeding/ very thin spot. Sort of unrelatedly, I then started working more seriously on my nutrition and gut health for other reasons (a multi-pronged approach but including lowering inflammation, accupuncture, Vitamin D high dose (as I had very low Vitamin D), a high quality prenatal vitamin, and extra selenium and iron, and about 6 weeks later I have a lot of new growth already. So there is hope! The hair thinning may be a symptom of a nutrient your body is crying for.
I just want to hold the hands of all the women reading this struggling with hair loss. I see you. And I have some good tips amongst all these lucky thick hair girlies. 1. See a dermatologist that specializes in hair loss. Taking oral minoxidyl has changed my life. 2. Got thinning spots? The absolute best fiber is this Korean made brand called ETUDE pang pang at Olive Young 3. If you are in a really dire place, go to a wig shop. I once wore a very tiny hair topper while my hair started to grow and it gave me so much confidence. Ain’t nothing wrong with some fake hair. 4. Also wash your hair every day. A clean scalp is the key to growth. Dandruff shampoos work best! 5. You’re so beautiful and no one is a harsher critic about your hair than you are!
Thanks for these tips! A red light helmet has helped me with some perimenopause thinning.
Yes to oral minoxidil! I’ve been on it for four months and already see a big difference.
Curly PSA!! I cannot recommend this product enough. It allows me to truly wash, run through my hair, and forgo any next steps with perfect results. I have 2c curls and used to do the full curly routine and now only need this stuff. If I use an extra 1-2 pumps, the curls stay beautiful to day 2 without any bonnet, etc. I pay this forward with joy: https://loveurcurls.com/products/all-in-one-wavy
Anyone got any suggestions for extreeemely sensitive scalp? I switched to conditioner only years ago and would like to start using shampoo again, but even the very very gentle ones cause my scalp to get very flaky tight dry and itchy straight away!
Cera vae shampoo or Odele sensitive. Both drugstore finds.
Iles Formula Shampoo, Conditioner and Styling Treatment has completely changed my hair! I have long, super-fine, highlighted hair that was always a pain to comb out (tangly!) and after using Iles for 6+ months, it’s glossy and soft and I only wash every 3-4 days vs. every 1-2 days. I also started sleeping with it in a pineapple bun (with a silk scrunchie) and that not only extends the wash, it gives my normally flat hair some bounce!
I’m here to champion Davines Love Curl line for wavy/curly hair. It’s on the pricy side, but a little goes a long way and I only wash my hair every three days anyway. I used drug store shampoos and conditioners for years, convinced that fancier hair care products were a scam, until my hair dresser used these products on my hair. My curls had never looked so smooth and defined! So now I’m a convert. Plus, they smell lovely.
Thank you for the friendly PSA about bangs. I was searching berkin bangs on Pinterest literally minutes ago…and now I am snapped back to reality. Don’t get bangs!😂
LOL! They are always so cute… on other people!
I cut bangs late last night….surprise! I do not look at all like Bardot! Guess its time to begin the growing out process. Don’t do it!!!
I have been waiting for a hair post to ask these questions! I think I have 2A hair. It has a bit of bend when I wide tooth comb wet hair in the shower, air dry, no products in low humidity (it’s typically very dry where I live) but when I do the exact same thing and I’m in a place with high humidity I have thick, bendy waves. I am SO curious about what my hair would do if I tried a full curly girl method, I think there might be a lot more curl lurking in there! 2B? 2C?! So my first question is, does anyone have recommendations for curly routines for medium/thick, smooth/fine, 2A (or 2B) hair? My second question is for people who regularly use product but don’t wash their hair every day. I wash my hair 1-2 times a week, which works really well for my hair type, but I don’t use any product so my hair gets a bit greasy in between washes and that’s it. A few times in my 20s I fell asleep after a wedding with hairspray or other product in and I really hated the experience of feeling and smelling the product residue all over the pillow case, and my face would always breakout or get rashy (or both!) the next day. I do have sensitive skin, so this might be a me problem! But I’ve always wondered if there are secret hacks that everyone is using to prevent breakouts and keep their pillowcases clean – do you just switch to a clean pillow case each night? This is my one hang up about trying a curly method!
wear a bonnet! This will keep product off you pillowcase and face. :)
Would have loved to see kinky, coil hair products and techniques…
On a previous post someone mentioned using a bit of conditioner (I just use drug store products) mixed with water in a spray bottle to use as a product for my thick wavy hair in place of expensive alternatives I wish I could buy- huge thanks!! life changing!! Love seeing all these different beautiful hair types
I love how Jo’s “Do you have a nighttime/before-bed hair routine?” became a book recommendation ;-D
Would love to see hair care for those of us who have embraced the gray!
bunch of baberham lincolns at cup of jo–everyone looks so fab! fellow thin hair girl (albeit very thick and knotty if i even think of sleeping on it wrong) who washes hair every day. have yet to find a treatment that doesn’t make my hair so weighed down, but I love the living proof clarifying shampoo which i use once a week (and also want to rec Christophe Robin Cleansing Purifying Scrub with Sea Salt, which is a luxe little treat!)
I follow abbey young method you can look her up and see all the results of people who do her methods. The best part is she is talking real science and suggesting drug store products so it’s not expensive. She is the real deal.
I’ve really been likely her method as well. I had years of using “clean” products coupled with damage and perimenopause and using her methods has really changed my hair for the good.
Ooh. Officially sold on the mason pearson brush, new wash, and maybe even going to a salon! They’ve been on my wishlist for a while now and sound like the perfect treat for this June baby!
Kelsey, I’m excited to try the herbal essence grapefruit! The way you describe your hair is similar to mine but I lighten it and that always throws a twist in which products I can use. Also your skin looks great!! I remember your beauty uniform from forever ago. I would love an updated blog post! For my sensitive rosacea probe skin mandelic acid has been amazing.
Oh thank you! I haven’t tried that particular acid, but I’m curious now. Do you have a favorite mandelic-acid product?
Yes the Paula Choice! It also has lactic acid in it as well. Neither one is high just enough to be effective. I quickly went from 2-3 nights a week to every night when I realized my skin doesn’t react🙂
I second the Paula’s Choice. Been using every day for a while now. I’ve seen a big change in my skin. Good to know: Walgreen’s makes a version that is almost exactly the same and I use that now for $12 instead of Paula’s Choice $$$. I love both products equally.
Elena, what’s the name of the Walgreens product?
When I was sixteen, I left France for a whole year as an exchange student in a US high school. Part of trying to fit in meant that I felt I had to have my hair washed every single day (also, shaving my legs all the way up, but that’s another story). So, every day, I would sacrifice 30 minutes of sleep to wash and blow dry my hair, wisely (or so I thought) alternating between shampoo days and conditioner days. It messed up my hair so much, but I was convinced that popularity came with having clean, shiny and nice smelling hair (spoiler: it did not). These days, I only wash my hair once in a week and whenever I’m in the shower, applying my hair mask, I can’t help but think of my high-maintenance hair era and laugh!
how’s the popularity? lol i used to think the same thing.
I have very thick hair – and a lot of it. It used to be very long until 3 weeks ago when I went for a pixie. (donated the hair). I found that my bike helmet is too wide now that all that bulk is gone and I feel so much lighter.
I regularly use beer on my curly hair 😊. It gives me beautiful, well-defined curls, and I’ve even noticed some new hair growth. I open the beer a few hours before washing my hair so the alcohol can evaporate. After shampooing (without conditioner), I pour the beer over my hair and scalp. Then I use a cotton T-shirt to gently squeeze out the excess moisture. I keep the leftover beer in the fridge and slightly warm it before the next use. Whenever I use conditioner (about every third wash), I skip the beer because my curls don’t turn out as defined.
I’m confused: beer doesn’t become non-alcoholic at room temperature (that’s how I am interpreting your statement “so the alcohol can evaporate,” perhaps I’m misunderstanding). I actually think it’s the alcohol that is doing what you like to your curls. Alcohols as a chemical compound are a common ingredient in hair products, particularly ones that help remove frizz. Less frizz leads to more defined looking curls. For example, I clicked through the Samin Nosrat recommended anti-frizz product, Hair Balm, to see if it had alcohol ingredients in it and it does. I’m a curly haired person who avoids these ingredients because they can dry your hair out over time, making frizz worse (and thus the vicious cycle ensues), so ultimately those products are a temporary solution to lock in moisture. Anyway I just wanted to bring this up in case any curly haired people are reading the comments. I love hearing about the interesting things people do for their curly hair!
P.S. to any curly haired readers, if you’re trying to reduce frizz, my hairdresser who specializes in curly hair has explained that your hair is frizzing because it’s seeking out moisture (i.e. it’s dry….thus why drying ingredients like alcohol don’t help the problem long term). When it’s rainy or humid, your hair is literally reaching out for the moisture in the air! So adding moisture to your hair is the solution. Leave-in conditioner and conditioning masks are great to moisturize your hair.
@Kara – my hairstylist also says the exact same thing about my curly hair seeking moisture. And why is it that my hair always looks so much better (more defined, moisturized) after a hair appt even though I’m using the exact same products (and I’m thinking the same amount of product) that she is. I’m not talking about the style as I realize she has a ton of expertise – but just the condition of my hair follicles.
@Lori I would bet it’s way more product than you think! (I mean I could be totally wrong for you, maybe you’ve asked her the exact amounts.) With my leave-in she basically told me to double what I was using! And the other trick she taught me was when I’m putting in conditioner, rub it into my strands…..I hold my hair between both hands and rub back and forth, basically agitating the hair strands to soak up every drop. Oh another tip from her is rinsing my conditioner out in cold water….my hair is the type that will “close” with cold water and “open” with warm/hot, so a cold rinse seals the moisture in. Not every hair type does that though I think!
I have super fine, thin hair. I love Living Proof Full collection and their 5 in 1 styling cream. Kristin Ess Extra gentle and The One “Signature” shampoos and conditioners and their Dry Finish Working Texture Spray. Moroccanoil Extra Volume shampoo and conditioner Verb Ghost Oil, Kerastase Elixir Ultime and Oribe Gold Lust Nourishing Oil work with my fine locks too. Side note: my son has super curly hair and highly recommends Living Proof coil Elongator
I hate my hair. It was always super fine, and not a lot of it… (think hair of a toddler… ). Then when I thought it couldn’t get worse, I developed a serious allergy to dye – wound up in hospital with a face so swollen I couldn’t see through my eyes for almost two weeks. If I do it again I will likely die within moments. Can it get worse, oh yeah it can… to combat autoimmune diseases I now take Biologics, and my hair is really falling out. It’s so sad, you can see my scalp… all I ever wanted was big curly hair like an Italian lady…. instead I got puritan hair that will never know fun. I have hoped that going grey might help…. but as mum went grey in her late 70sand my 83 year old still hasn’t, I don’t even get to hold out for that. I have so much hair envy, but at least I can wash it every day since it dried in ten minutes. Sorry for the winge but I am soooo jealous!
I friend of mine lost her hair from auto immune disorder brought on by a traumatic event. She rocks wigs and looks fantastic.
That’s a lot to deal with! I had my thyroid removed 10 years ago and have issues with losing hair when my hormone levels are out of whack. It’s frustrating, especially when hair is a central focus of female beauty. I wear loose, bright headbands when I’m feeling self conscious about it (like this, except I cut it into 2-3inch sections: https://www.naturallife.com/products/full-boho-bandeau-headband-garden-waves?variant=45757257384109). We both have so many non-hair gifts to present to the world, though! Sending you solidarity and a big hug :)
My hair is thinning a lot too. Social media feeds me a lot of images of wigs and hair pieces/extenders that look pretty darn good. Has anyone tried them? I realize they can be quite pricey but…
Sometimes you need to just whinge! I’m sorry you’re going through that. I have no advice-from-experience but I would say treat yourself to a big curly Italian-lady wig! Wigs have come such a long way now. My great aunt used to rock them all the time (incidentally, an Italian lady herself) and I remember someone once asked her if that was her hair to which she replied “of course it is, I paid for it!”
I started using Conscia solid shampoos and conditioners a few years ago. They smell amazing. It’s a wonderful sensory experience using them. I love how my hair feels!
My hair confession is I brought a picture from Alison’s instagram to the hairdresser as my inspiration picture and got one of the best haircuts of my life. Thank you for being my hair inspiration!
I have never felt MORE HONORED. This made my day/week/year! xoxo
@Alison Piepmeyer Piepmeyer – you DO have amazing hair! How often do you end up doing the curly hair routine? And how long does it typically take you?
As someone with soft, stick-straight hair, I am sooo jealous of Alison’s waves and texture and color.
As of a month ago I’m back on trichologist abbey yung’s ~drugstore~ shampoo recs for fine hair- as well as being more consistent with a luxurious night oil, and decadent daily leave-in conditioner. Happy to report that we are growing and glowing over here! My stick-straight strawberry strands are finally coming in wavy white and I absolutely adore them- because: what a privilege. Also, for those of us in the limited spoons community, I highly recommend keeping a small, travel hair dryer in a lidded basket tucked by the bed (and, honestly, any and every thing you want to keep consistent within an arms reach – floss, eye serums, retinoid, you name it!)
Finally getting a good routine (skin, hair, etc.) always feels like a miracle when it finally happens! I have fine hair that likes to be wavy sometimes, straight other times, but always frizzy (and esp frizzy with my postpartum whispies growing in). But! I finally got my frizz under control: Kerastase moisturize shampoo/conditioner, Crown Affair microfiber hair towel, JVN Air Dry Cream, if I’m air drying duh, or JVN Recovery Serum if I’m going to blow dry it, it’s a heat protector and tames my frizz perfectly. I use the T3 Airebrush Blow Dry Brush and it gives such great volume with such minimal effort. Highly recommend all, esp to my fellow new moms.
My curly hair knows no such thing as “loose waves” as an option 😭. There are so many types of curls, of course! While I love my hair when it’s set and corkscrew-y, I feel like I have very limited options on days 3-5 between washes. Would love to know what others do! I wear a hat, with wispy curls pulled out of the sides :)
My hair probably isn’t quite as curly as yours (it’s a combo of 2c/3a), but for me it goes like this: Day 1: Wash day — the curls be poppin’. Day 2: Flattened/slightly frizzy curls that I refresh with a little bit of water product, but are definitely less defined than day 1 curls. Sometimes I’ll put my hair half-up if the curls are really not cooperating. Day 3: Some kind of updo–pony tail, hair claw, a braid, etc. Repeat!
You all! I commented about this a couple of months ago, but I FINALLY GOT A PERM. I got it a week ago, and I freaking love it! I naturally have fine, stick-straight hair, but a decent amount of it. I was worried that it would make my hair feel brittle like the home perms I got from my Mom in the 80s. But my hair feels super soft and has such a beautiful wave. I wash my hair every other day, and I put in a little curl bomb, scrunch it, and let it air dry. That’s it!! I’m so, so happy with it.
Feature some short haired ladies next for those of us in the pixie crowd!!
Yes!
Agreed, from the bowl cut crowd!
I would love to explore this further! It’s so interesting that all of you CoJ ladies have well below your shoulder length hair. Back in the day it seemed moms were always cutting their hair short, which probably actually requires more maintenance. My own hair is shoulder length and I get it cut every 8 weeks religiously, but I don’t do really anything else!
yes! I had same thought lol. Currently I really like Barb clay pomade for my short hair, has a nice flexible hold. My hair is very straight, I often wish for curly hair and was recently enticed by Merman Sea spray and clay on instagram 😂 it does give me some beachy curls, though I find sea salt does dry out your hair. My ultimate dream is to learn how to cut my own hair so I can touch up my fade in between cuts :)
Anyone have a shampoo & conditioner rec for DMV’s hard water situation?
The water is HARD. I’ve recently tried Ever Pure Clarify and Metal Detox (both are from L’Oreal) once a week. I think Metal Detox is better for my hair situation. I have short, fine hair that would droop the day after washing and would say I can now go two days without washing.
I’ve had good luck for a few years with rice shampoo and conditioner (in DC). I use Viori bars, in the “men’s” sandalwood because it’s warm, soft, and less perfume-y than the “women’s” botanical options. And the Acure clarifying shampoo once a month or so to get a good reset on potential mineral buildup especially during pool season!
have had this problem in London, where the water is also very hard: Tri-Swim shampoo and conditioner (or probably any swimming shampoo and conditioner) is really good! (tried vinegar rinses and clarifying shampoos, which didn’t work as well for me) you can also look into getting a shower filter attachment
Thank you all! Great tip on switching out the shower head; am going to try that.
I’ve got curly/wavy hair and am since I work from home, am very lazy (ie slob mode) much of the time. This means it is up in a pony much of the time. I did recently buy some of the french hair pins and LOVE them – I feel so fancy when I wear them and so easy to use. My other tip when I’m going out and want to look halfway decent is this lovely hair drying aide: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KWKJPNF?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_fed_asin_title&th=1 I was trying to figure out how to simulate the giant over the head bulbous hairdryer my stylist has me sit under. This weird hooded hair drying thing is great – $15 and goes around the nozzle of any blow dryer. You can sit and read or rest while your hair is drying and my hair looks pretty darn good.
I’ve gone from having thick, coarse, pin-straight Asian hair that wouldn’t hold a curl no matter how much hairspray was involved to hair that’s slowly turning gray, a little frizzy, and surprisingly wavy as I cruise through my 40s. It’s been quite the plot twist, but I’m learning to embrace my hair exactly as it is. I’m pretty low-maintenance and a (slightly guilty) member of the wash-daily club, but I’ve found that a great haircut makes all the difference. I love a long shag—it adds texture, movement, and makes my hair much easier to work with. For products, OUAI’s Thick Hair Shampoo and Conditioner have been fantastic. My hair—especially those wiry grays!—feels moisturized, the frizz is tamed, and it leaves behind a lovely scent that actually lasts all day. Dae’s 3-in-1 Styling Cream and Taming Wand is a total game changer. I love the mascara wand-like applicator. Those rogue baby hairs, flyaways, and random gray hairs—the ones that somehow grow two inches overnight and announce their presence to the world—stay nicely under control without leaving my hair looking greasy or feeling crunchy.
Ha! My bestie and I were jsut discussing shampoo yesterday. I had never heard of New Wash before. I have type 1a or 1b hair and have found the less i do, the better. I wash with a shampoo bar (3 years of hiBar, but open to new recommendations), comb damp hair and let air dry. I wash 3-4 times a week. No products, unless my hair is very short, in which case I use R&co dry shampoo styling paste for some texture. My hair is about one inch above my shoulders and I’m craving a change, maybe a chin length bob so its off my neck for summer.
Fellow fine, THIN-haired folks help me out- Post-partum has left me with hair that is very thin and wavy. It goes from ‘cute and wavy’ to ‘stringy mess’ quickly. How do people refresh waves in the morning if their hair is dry? A lot of wavy/curly products are super heavy or best on wet hair.
May I suggest a dry shampoo? I have fine hair and I find that it adds great volume and body to my fine hair on day 2, often my best hair day. I don’t have a faouvirte dry shampoo, get whatever fits your budget and has a scent you like!
I have similar hair and I’ve liked Odele Air Dry Styler and Virtue 6-in-1 (separately, not used together) on damp hair. On dry hair, I use Sun Bum Texturizing Sea Spray…not sure that I recommend it yet, but the smell is nice.
I have thin, fine, mostly straight hair and I have tried pretty much every dry shampoo on the market. I Dew Care Tap Secret is my holy grail (I get it on Amazon). Non aerosol, no weird smell, leaves no weird residue, doesn’t irritate my scalp, and most importantly, you can brush it into dry hair and it looks instantly clean and volumized for at least eight hours. Unless your scalp itself is dark, get the white one, it doesn’t leave a cast on my dark hair. It doesn’t mess up the light wave that my hair has but if your hair is wavy beyond brushing out, you might need to put it in the night before.
I flip my hair over and spray my hair with water using the Tomat spray bottle from Ikea. Then I scrunch while flipped over.
It felt surprisingly cathartic to read that Joanna and Kelsey wash their hair daily, too! I think that’s it’s ok to normalize that straight, fine our like ours does need daily (or every other day) washing because it gets so oily. No amount of “training” has/will change this, at least for me. If I do skip washing my hair on the second day, it will be pretty oily in the morning, and look gross by the end of the day. For a while, I was confused by hair stylists telling me that my hair was thick when I associated fine hair with being oily. But now I’ve learned that I have a thick head of hair (the heft of a pony tail when you lift it all up) consisting of fine hair (each individual strand is thin; you can barely feel it between your fingers). It makes more sense now! My tips and tricks are pretty few and far between as my hair does not hold any curl and becomes oilier with most products. So, I try to get the best haircut I can, typically twice a year, so that it looks good on its own. I’ll put it in a microfiber towel for 20ish minutes while I get dressed and put on skincare/makeup. Then, depending on how much time I have left, I’ll either air dry or blow dry, both of which have nearly identical results. I don’t bother blow drying until it’s completely dry, as leaving a little dampness to air dry can sometimes add a little more texture. But it’s amazing how every minute spent blow drying the crown and roots seems to knock off an hour of air drying time! Product-wise, I make a point to rotate between several shampoos and conditioners as my hair feels a little lifeless when I stick to the same routine for a while. I also make it a point to any hair products with parabens or sodium lauryl/laureth sulfates as they provide that initial satisfying clean but ultimately strip out healthy natural oils from the scalp and are considered hormone-distrupting, carcinogenic chemicals. Some favorites include: – Ethique’s Clarifying, Volumising, or Everyday shampoos and Volumising or Everyday conditioners, which come in bar form, lather nicely, and last forever. I use these most days. – Phillip Anderson Apple Cider Vinegar shampoo and conditioner, which don’t smell of vinegary or fake apple. I’ll use these a few times a week: the shampoo offers a nice, deep clean and the conditioner is really moisturizing without adding heaviness. – Occasionally, if I’ve used a bit of Klorane’s non-aerosol dry shampoo (highly recommended; no gross smells or stickiness; blends in my dark brown hair without white cast), I’ll use Ouai’s detox shampoo. I’d won’t buy the Ouai shampoo again, though, as it’s so expensive. – I’ve also liked Andalou Naturals Apple Cider Vinegar smooth shine line, as well as Giovanni’s 50:50 line. In a pinch, Trader Joe’s tee tree line works, too, but both the shampoo and conditioner feel pretty watered down. I’ve used a Mason Pearson comb for the last ten years which doesn’t cause breakage right after showering, helps pair my hair, and is good for detangling before bed. I also have a round brush and a paddle brush which I use while blow drying alongside a heat protectant, R+Co’s One. I’d love some recommendations of products which help to add some texture/definition/hold while air drying or lightly blow drying. Any ideas? I loved the smell of Oribe’s Hair Alchemy Heatless Styling Balm which I received a sample of, but couldn’t be convinced that it provided much discernable hold. Salt sprays feel crunch and sticky. Thanks in advance!
I’ve got straight/slightly wavy blonde hair, and the itchiest scalp ever. My dermatologist recommended rotating 3 different dandruff shampoos, using each for two weeks at a time. It’s made a huge difference. I follow with whatever conditioner (Dove right now) and either air dry or use It’s a Miracle 10 Lite if blow drying. I use a Dyson. And my grays are blending with my color nicely – lucky me!
I have a really sensitive scalp. When I’m stuck between options ceravae shampoo and conditioner is great. It can be a bit much in the summer when there is humidity but when I use it I can eliminate any kind of scent causing an issue. I’ve used the lite version of It’s a10! But that irritates my skin including my hands too much.
I bleach the living daylights out of my own Chelsea-ish pixie cut and can contribute little to healthy-hair discourse, but I will note that my husband and I rolled out for Kaitlyn and Joanna’s LITTLE APOCALYPSES chat in Brooklyn last month and he was absolutely starstruck by the fabulosity of everyone’s hair at the bookstore. He was not at all prepared for the collective CoJ hair game!
Great comment :D
Meeting *the* Lauren O. IRL was one of the very best parts!!! Thank you so much for coming. xoxo
I was so nervous about saying hello to you all that I *switched out my shoelaces,* the first thing women notice about each other, obviously.
I love this. Before my late 40s, I never looked good with hair above shoulder length. Now that I’m menopausal, I don’t look good with hair below it. I have fairly stick straight hair, but it’s started to develop a little wave since I’ve aged, and I always wear it in a long bob with some curtain bangs and some blond highlights just in the top layers to help hide the grays as they come in. I currently use Roz and it’s fine, but I’ll probably switch to something else when I run out. I love the scent of Lenore Greyl shampoo so I’ll probably go back to that. I use Shu Uemura’s Essence Absolue hair oil, because I have a lot of frizz, and this is the most moisturizing oil I’ve found. I also really love Oribe’s texturing spray. I switched from a regular hair dryer to a blowout brush dryer, and if I’m not airdrying my hair, I love to use this to tame my hair and keep it from flipping out.
Ooh, I’m fascinated that Alison has used the bowl method and been successful! I’ve watched many Sophie Marie videos and I’ve thought there’s no way that actually works? It seems SO cumbersome but maybe it’s worth it! I have wavy hair and it used to look great with very little help (used to, like, in my 20s and early 30s) but for the past decade it’s been declining and I’m finally trying to take matters into my own hands! I’ve been a wash and go person for so long that it’s hard to stomach spending a lot of time on my hair, but then again…everyone sees it, every day. So if you’re gonna spend a lot of time on something, might as well be hair?
The bowl method works great for my wavy hair!
I bought big 90s supermodel style Velcro hair rollers about a month or two ago and boy, I love them. There was a bit of a learning curve at first but honestly it’s now quicker than my old heat tools routine and the volume is totally nuts. Added bonus is having my hair pulled back and off my face and neck while I lather on face cream, body oil and sunscreen. Anyone else out there doing the roller game?
I am here for the rollers! I had a air dried shag for ages (I used to go to Edo in SF) and then I just got the urge for bouncy 90’s hair. I bought some Velcro rollers and I’ve gotten so many compliments. Even if I just put in a few it makes such a difference. It felt silly because I’ve probably bought and given away the same set of Velcro rollers at least 3 times in life! I feel like I’m in an episode of Friends when I’m walking around the house in them
Can you use heat with the rollers or just air dry?
Yes, I’ve used big Velco rollers forever.
Hi Claire, the rollers I got (Kitsch XL) recommend drying your hair 80% of the way and then rolling and letting them air dry the remaining bit. I find that if I blow dry, the residual heat in my hair will help the rollers dry in about 20 min. I hope that helps!
@Claire Mazur and Erica Cerulo Sometimes I do the same method Charlotte mentioned and if it’s second or third day hair and I need an umph I use a thermal brush to before rolling up some top sections. The return of the thermal brush has also been a revelation. I remember my mom having something similar in the 80’s, but I love that it’s quiet and it quickly polishes everything. I just have a cheap Wavy Talk version and only use it on dry hair.
I love how all of these recommendations conflict, which just goes to show hair is personal lol. For example: I can’t believe no one mentioned K18 products! They really work… for me! The dry shampoo disappears oil and restores shape and volume, and doesn’t show even on my dark brown hair, and the oil is amazing for frizz. I just wish they would come out with a curl gel.
I love K18, too! I use the volume spray and the dry shampoo. Both are dreamy and the smell is to die for. Medium length, wavy brunette here who can vouch that the dry shampoo totally disappears. Truly, I’ve never had a better, longer lasting dry shampoo.
K18 worked for me until it didn’t- at least treatment wise. The dry shampoo is good but I prefer The Not your Mothers. For bonding treatment I just tried redkens and I really like it. When I use a bonding treatment I can easily go a week inbetween washes
Pureology nanoworks shampoo and conditioner. Not every shampoo but when my hair feels blah, it brings it back. Started using redken one leave in a few months ago and have much better hair in the humidity. Fine curly hair but lots of it. I wash and blow dry every couple of days.
Does anyone else have the problem that your hair is super textured/wavy on the lower half of your head and super poker straight on the top half? A hairstylist told me it could be because the top gets more damaged but I haven’t heat styled for years and the top is still so straight. I would like to embrace my natural texture but I can’t get all my hair to play along, ha ha.
Yessss! I would give anything to have my big Pretty Woman era Julia Roberts curls on TOP of my head rather than just underneath. But alas, my hair on top resembles the Cathy cartoon if I let it do its own thing. I was told it was damage too but avoided any kind of heat styling for years and it still wouldn’t hold a curl. So I just chalked it up to UV damage?? Who knows.
Look up Irish curls.
Yes! I have the same issue! My hair has great curl on the under side if aid dried but the top stays stick straight! I would love to know why…
Yes! I’d also say that my top layer is the straightest of the bunch and most prone to frizz. When I switched to a razor-cut shag it really helped. Now my top layer is much shorter and not as weighed down so it waves more readily!
Same for me. It got more pronounced when I got pregnant, and did for my friend as well. I can pretty much have ringlets at my nape and just barely a bend on my tops and sides.
I experience this as well! Like you, I was told it’s damage, but I don’t heat style my hair. A mystery! Somehow, Acure brand hydrating conditioner helps with my overall wave definition, including the top portion (although it’s always a loose wave compared to what’s underneath). By contrast, when I only shampoo my hair (yes sometimes I’m lazy and just want to be clean quickly) the top portion is especially stick straight. My guess is the issue has something to do with getting the right hydration balance. This is my working hypothesis!
I have fine wavy hair. I don’t brush my hair after I wash but use my fingers to detangle and apply Morocco oil curly cream and gel to help form my waves/curls. Does anyone have advice for reviving waves second or third day? I love my hair the first day after a wash but then my hair trends to fall flat and/or frizzy. I’ve tried re-wetting it or using mousse but neither works well!
For those air drying their hair, are you leaving the house with it wet, or are you getting up early enough to let it air dry? I don’t like being out in public with wet hair (unless I’m at the beach).
I am definitely leaving the house with wet hair! (Unless it’s frigid outside.) My hair takes 5-6 hours to fully air dry, so definitely don’t have time for that in the mornings. At this point, if people see me with wet hair, I figure, “At least they know I showered today.”
I used to wash in the morning and just leave with it wet. In recent years, I wash in the evening. In the morning, I spray it down to reactivate the curls, but it’s not enough to make it look very wet and it dries quickly.
Kelsey – I LOVE the overalls you’re wearing in the top pic! Do you mind sharing a link? :)
Thanks, Kristina! They are Ace & Jig, but I got them in 2023 and they’re no longer available, sadly. They do pop up on resale sites fairly frequently though!
Does anyone else have just super straight hair? I have fine hair but a lot of it (until recent post partum hair loss). And it is so just so straight there is nothing I can do to it to style it. I once asked my long time stylist if there were any products that would give it texture and she said “your hair doesn’t have texture” 😂 I just wash every other day, comb with a wide tooth comb, and air dry. And then I often pull it into a low pony or bun since I have 2 toddlers. It’s always felt boring to me and I so wish I could have waves or curls! But grass is always greener I’m sure.
Lizzie, 100% yes! I call it “Vidal Sassoon wash-and-go hair,” while my hairdresser calls it “glass hair.” I have a lot of hair, and nothing seems to hold. It takes ages to air dry, so I usually just blow-dry it and leave it at that. Even curls from a curling iron drop out within 20 minutes. For my wedding, the main goal was simply to make the style last through the ceremony!
Yes, I really related to this! Once in a blue moon my hair stylist will try to curl my hair and we giggle like we’re playing truth or dare because, no matter the number of products or incredible technique, by the time she’s finished the first pieces will be falling flat and it’ll be pretty much straight by the time I get home. Oh well. I’ve learned to accept my hair as is and view good hair cuts (about $75 in Seattle for my experienced stylist, 2-3x per year) and higher quality than drugstore-level shampoo/conditioner (in the $15-20 per bottle range) as worthy investments as I won’t be wasting money on styling products. Having a lot of layers, especially face framing ones, and keeping my hair medium length (about to my armpits?) so it doesn’t get too heavy helps to create some movement, especially if I twist it around while drying.
Whelp, menopausally speaking, my magic hair product is…oral minoxidil. Don’t be afraid to ask your doctor about it! It is super cheap and has made such a difference.
SAME! I was taking Nutrafol which is $88 a month. My derm laughed when I told him what I was taking and immediately recommended minoxidil which is a few bucks. I’ve been really pleased a few months in!
Kesley, you would look great with bangs. just saying!
Ruth, don’t tempt me! 😂
Oops, *Kelsey!
I stared razor cutting my own hair after realizing my fave parts of stylist cuts were the finishing touch razor layers after a scissor cut. It looks so good! My hair’s pretty forgiving, and I commit hair sins all the time (it looks GREAT after I’ve slept with wet hair!) I’ve tried the co-wash method that so many people rave a bout, but it just left my hair feeling so greasy and gunky. Turns out I have low-porosity hair, which takes forever to dry and doesn’t suck up moisture–leaving me with overly saturated locks. Good ol’ herbal essences works like a charm! I may even (gasp!) dip into shampoo with plathates from time to time.
My stylist once offered a class for clients who wanted to learn how to use a styling razor for at-home bang trims and it was SO fun to spend an evening laughing and experimenting in the salon with a bunch of other people who were down to give it a go. I was nervous at first, but now I use it all the time without even thinking about it.
I have fine, wavy hair (that has gotten thicker and curlier after each pregnancy and now again in my mid-40’s – perimenopause??). My holy grail hair product is JVN Air Dry Cream. It’s the perfect amount of hold for my waves without weighing my hair down. I can go full curly-girl method with more product and get ringlets or (more often) use less product and get looser waves. So simple – and not too expensive!
I need to try that! I have fine, wavy hair as well. I’ve been on a journey of trying to maximize my waves/curls. The curly girl method is intimidating! I did try Bumble and Bumble’s air dry cream and it made my hair super soft but it almost weighed down my waves.
YES! I’m obsessed with the JVN products, air dry is great, and I love their recovery serum, and the hair oil is the first I’ve ever used that didn’t make my hair look greasy immediately.
Wash with TJ’s three in one, comb with a wide-tooth comb, air dry, done. I have no patience or desire to do anything else with my hair.
I subscribe to the same hair ethos as editor Kaitlyn – but my hair is more like Joanna’s. Jayne from Edo Salon influenced me to the extent that I got an appointment at her salon in San Francisco on a trip years ago! I have had my hair cut with a razor ever since and it has literally changed my life. I also use new wash and it has changed my hair for the better. Not for everyone, but for me worth the price for hair that feels like how my hair was meant to be.
Wow! How fun! I have friends who have made plans for tattoos and hair cuts while traveling. It always seems like a cool experience/souvenir.
I’m curious if there are others out there whose hair has changed dramatically as they’ve aged? When I hit puberty as a kid, my hair got SUPER curly and stayed that way until I was maybe 32. Ever since then, the curl has significantly faded to the point that it’s barely wavy, and that’s really only the top layer. The bottom layer is practically straight. It’s been so frustrating. I can’t wear my hair “as is” anymore because it’s neither curly, wavy, nor straight, so now I have to style it all the time. Having naturally curly hair was such a big part of my identity, and now it’s gone! I asked my hair stylist about it and her best guess was that it’s just age. Boo.
“it’s neither curly, wavy, nor straight, so now I have to style it all the time” Sigh. I so relate to this.
Yep, me too! Mine was fairly straight (slight wave) as a child. In puberty, it became curly. Then with every pregnancy, the curl fell more and more limp. (I was having kids through my mid-20’s to mid-30’s, so I attributed it to that, but maybe it would have happened anyway?) So now I have hair with varying amounts of wave/loose curl and one ringlet hanging on in the back of my head, lol. When adding on the color change that’s happening now, sometimes I don’t even recognize my hair!
“The only constant, is change.” Adaptation is an essential practice for life on earth. Never more so than now.
I have fine, straight hair (I’ve worn it in a bob for years) and I am a John Frieda Brilliant Brunette girl. I use Suave once a week or so. I wash, condition the ends, comb and usually blow-dry every day. Because it’s short, it just takes a few minutes to blow-dry!
Me, too! Baby blonde, tho, and about the same straight texture I had as a toddler. Not enough conditioner, I turn into a flyaway dandelion. Too much, and it looks dirty. Slightly angled bob, just enough blow dry to put it in place, a touch of hairspray to add texture. I did develop a thin spot in my bangs after a thyroid crash a few years ago, but mostly camo this by sweeping them slightly to the left.
When people say they wash their hair every few days, does that mean shampoo/conditioner or not even get it wet? I run most days and cant imagine not at least rinsing the sweat out of my hair afterwards with water.
Hi Emma! I don’t even get mine wet, but I’ve also exercised maybe a handful of times since having my daughter haha. A few years ago when I was running a couple times a week, I got VERY sweaty and had to wash my hair after every run.
Usually it means you don’t even get it wet. My hair is similar to Kelsey’s, I’ve noticed if I just rinse with water it gets even greasier somehow. Even if there’s a bit of sweat, it will look better if I just let the sweat dry and use some dry shampoo. I typically only wash after high-sweat workout or swim days.
Hey Emma, I wash every few days but in between (esp after running/exercising) I rinse well, rubbing my scalp as if I’m washing it, and then use a bit of hair milk/leave in conditioner on the ends.
I find it so fascinating that I never seem to see hair like mine out in the world, or in these kind of round-ups, tutorials, etc, even though you all cover a range of hair types! I’m so curious, do others feel that way too? Is this a common feeling? Mine is *super* thick, somewhere between wavy and curly, with a tendency to frizz. And, just for fun, some of it is coarse and curlier, some of it is fine and basically straight, especially near the nape of my neck.
I think this post isn’t covering multiple hair types, since it’s just covering the staff
Hi Katie, I can so relate! I too have thick, mostly wavy hair, with some parts curlier or straighter. Frizz is omnipresent. One of the things I like about my hair is that if I put the effort in, it will usually style nicely and mostly hold that way. The thing is, it’s unsustainable for me to put in that effort. Fancy date night, going to a wedding, family photos, sure, but I can’t nor do I want to exert that time and energy for everyday life. I’ve tried out other methods, curly girl, etc., but in the end my hair looks the exact same. I heard the key for that was to let your hair dry completely before breaking the cast. I followed this to the letter but ultimately my hair looked the same as it does when I step out of the shower and let it air dry. If I sleep in any kind of bun/pineapple, there is a guaranteed kink happening somewhere. If I need a “quick fix” where I feel like it’s more presentable, out come the flat iron or curling iron since high heat is a way to tame it into submission in a pinch. However, if I curl it, by the end of the day it will kind of fall (hence the “mostly hold” comment above). Hair spray can help a bit, but even then, it often just kind of promotes tangling. Also, I know this may read as blasphemy to some, but at one point I ran out of conditioner and only washed with shampoo and my hair both looked and felt the exact same. It’s like my hair resists almost any distorting influence and chooses to return to its original essence.
I have similar. All types of patterns and curl types. Top layer is frizzy and dry and won’t do anything nice. Bottom is straighter with ringlets healthy shiny at ends. I have about 4 different types of hair at one time. It almost never comes out the same twice. It used to be thick and now as I get older- now 40, it is extremely thin – alarmingly so, on under layers So I’d say I’m 2b-3c in curl patterns. Only time it has worked out is when I’m pregnant and it looks very thick shiny and I’ve tricked myself into thinking I’ve found the right hair routine only to be postpartum and it all leaves ha!
I have this hair. Tons of it, pretty coarse, somewhere between wavy and curly… with different textures all over my head (and not just top/bottom or front/back difference – one side is more wavy, the other more curly!). Always frizzy at the root, though it’s very well conditioned – thanks to hair’s natural shed/regrowth cycle, we all have shorter pieces throughout our hair; without the weight of length mine like to be extra curly and wiry. I dream of air drying, but it’ll never happen – too much frizz, too much time, and the weight of all the water pulls it flat at the root. That said, when I do a full curl routine, which is 95% of showers… my hair is absolutely glorious, and I get asked about my hair routine by a stranger at least weekly. I’d trade for less impressive but lower effort hair in a heartbeat.
I just bought a Mason Pearson BN1 (nylon and boar bristle) from Costco last week! I use a Mason Pearson detangling comb for wet hair, a puddle brush from Aveda and a heart-shaped detangling brush from ReFa that keeps my hair sleek and neat. I also use my almost 20-yrs old Denman D3 for blow-drying. My hair is thick and straight, always have been silky smooth and super easy to take care of, but something has changed when I hit 45. I keep spotting bumpy/crinkly/thick strands and they’re driving me crazy! Apparently, hormonal changes affect my hair follicle shape and that’s why some of my hair grow unevenly. I’m hoping that massaging my scalp with good brushes would help, but gray hairs are ironically smooth and straight, so I often wonder how my hair would look in the future. My cat LOVES chewing my hair, so I try not to rely on styling products, but I love Nuxe Huile Prodigieuse (the OG and the Florale), or L’Occitane Intensive Repair Sublimating Oil when I remember to use them. For shampoo and conditioner, I just use Trader Joe’s brand. Tea tree tingle shampoo and Shea butter & coconut oil hair mask are my favorites.
Oops, PADDLE brush, not puddle. I guess it’s time to get my eyes checked!
The Mason Pearson detangling comb is the best!
Any other pixie friends out there? What are you using for sticky stuff (pomade)? I have been using Barb but I need a change…
Oribe foreverrrrr!!!